


Right, Left, March

by SCFox



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-29
Updated: 2015-02-03
Packaged: 2018-03-04 05:29:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 25,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2954030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SCFox/pseuds/SCFox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the threat of Corypheus behind them, Cassandra, Leliana and Estelle have upped and moved to The Grand Cathedral in Val Royeaux. With Cassandra's ordination imminent, the three of them, with the support of their friends, have a fair amount to get used to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I never expected 'Sleepless' to be so popular, but I'm very grateful for every comment and kudos. I'm pretty attached to my Inquisitor, and as long as you lovely people will have me, I quite enjoy the prospect of writing more of their adventures. Thank you for reading!

The Grand Cathedral in Val Royeux was a hive of activity, even though the sun had barely risen. It was a huge building,  but there were people busying themselves everywhere. Today was one of the most important days in the Chantry’s life. After a horrific explosion at The Temple of Sacred Ashes, every senior member of the Chantry, including the Divine, had been murdered. A young noble from the Free Marches had raised an army, and an Inquisition, and fought back against the guilty parties. She defeated them utterly, and now, after months of preparation, the new Divine was finally being ordained. It was the first step on a long road to recovery for the whole of Thedas, and as all major changes in history, it was not going to be an easy one. At least the key players got along well enough, they would need to work together to steer the sinking ship that was the Chantry.

Two of them were sat in the small living room come study that had been assigned to them, on the floor which held their quarters. It was an odd shape, being housed in a tower,  but they seemed perfectly happy with it. It was comparatively small, if it was stood against the rest of the Cathedral, but there was something warm and comfortable about it. There was little in it, the main feature being a large fireplace. A sofa faced it, and two lounge chairs stood side on to it. Apart from that, there was a bookcase in the corner, some shelving by the fireplace, and two small tables. A fire was blazing and it warmed the room, and though the floor and walls were stone, a heavy Orlesian rug graced the centre of it, and some wall decorations served to keep away the chill.

“So, today’s the day huh?” Estelle was the one to break the silence.

“I can’t quite believe it’s happening either,” agreed Leliana.

The two of them were both exceptionally nervous. They had bigger parts to play in this than either of them would like, purely because this was the foundation for a new era. They hadn’t even officially been assigned to their roles, and they already had to be on high alert. The only true allies the new Divine had in the whole Cathedral, were them. Many people were less than pleased with the changes that had been proposed, and the fact that the woman appointed had never even been a priest. Of course there was some support, but everything was on tenterhooks, and a lot of it hinged on how the day went. From the moment Cassandra had asked them to be her Left and Right Hands respectively, they had spent at least part of everyday training with one another. Leliana was helping Estelle hone her eyes and ears, and Estelle was helping Leliana with combat training, as she had not been as active in the field as she once was.

“I wonder how Cassandra’s getting on,” pondered Estelle. The pair had already cracked open some of Lady Trevelyan’s mead, just to take off the edge, and they were thoughtfully drinking it.

Leliana had to stop herself from laughing, “I imagine the fuss is driving her crazy. All the dressings and fittings. She’s not what you’d call a people person. I heard the other day she absolutely refused to change into her robes even with only the dressmaker there. The poor woman had to stand outside every five minutes. She was crying at the end of the day.”

“Oh dear. I guess it’s a privacy thing? Or perhaps just a nervous hysteria thing.”

Leliana shook her head with a sigh, “You can’t very well be shy in the public eye. Especially as Divine.”

“I’ve been trying to coach her in blagging it, making yourself look comfortable, even when you’re not. But after every session, however well she’s done, she completely melts down at the end. I’ve gone through half a dozen bottles of wine calming her down. I don’t think I’ve had more than three hours sleep a night in...a while. Even though I haven't managed to see her that much in the last few days. She's always off doing something or other. Still can't seem to sleep right without knowing she's ok.”

“She’s lucky you’re such a good friend. I love her dearly, but I don’t believe I’d manage to cope with that. Birds are easier than people.”

“Sometimes I think fighting Corypheus was less scary than having to talk Cassandra down when she’s in a foul mood.”

“She is under a lot of stress,” sympathised Leliana, “At least she has us.”

“I just hope she can stand it all, I worry about her.”

“Me too. But that’s what we’re here for. She’s a strong woman, I’m sure she’ll be ok.”

“I know. Doesn’t stop me being concerned though.”

“That’s a good thing, for her. But come on, we should get ourselves ready.”

Estelle allowed herself to be lead through to Leliana’s room, grabbing the mead on the way. They had been sparring earlier that morning when their own garments had been delivered, and it was just easiest to leave there. It always helped to have an extra pair of hands when putting on armour. Estelle had coaxed the blacksmith from Skyhold, Harritt, to be the one to make their new attire. She trusted his work, and knew it to be good. Plus he already knew both of them and their separate requirements, so it saved a lot of time and effort in meeting somebody completely new. Neither of them had opened their respective packages yet. Now they did, taking off the lids of sturdy crates, and were immediately dazzled by the high polish and quality of each component.

“Wow!” exclaimed Estelle.

She carefully extracted from the crate, a beautiful silver cuirass, emblazoned with the Chantry Heraldry, the only slight difference in it was that instead of the inner sunburst, a simple hand was embossed, a right hand. She grinned at the personal nod, and turned to regard Leliana, she had noticed the personalisation too, only it was a left hand in the centre of her cuirass, and she smiled.

“These boots are so soft, and so...sleek,” Leliana was enamoured.

“I bet you they’re the most comfortable footwear you will ever come across, the gloves too.”

“He even sorted out new mail for us. Oh, look Estelle, that’s very clever,”

Leliana pointed to the bottom of Estelle’s crate, where two thigh-holsters for her daggers lay. They were delicately criss-crossed leather straps, to protect her legs between the bottom of the chainmail, and the top of the boots, which were a little shorter than Leliana’s, whilst still letting her move quickly.

“I should probably wash up a bit, before I put the shiny new things on,” realised Estelle, “It was a pretty intense match this morning. Thought you were going to cut my hand off!”

Leliana looked a little abashed, “Sorry, nerves, I suppose. Which is silly. I don’t do nervous, even after everything I did for Justinia and the Inquisition.”

“Nervous is good. Keeps you sharp,”

“That is very true. Anyway, go ahead and borrow my washroom, I’ll use it after you,”

“You sure?”

“Of course.”

As Estelle disappeared into the washroom, Leliana tidied a few bits and pieces away, whilst looking for others, and humming to herself. She was surprised when she caught herself doing the humming, she had done little of serving Justinia, and even Estelle. It was a good sign that she was finding herself again though.

“Shouldn’t Josie be arriving later?” called the Bard,

“Yes!” The happiness was very clear in the Inquisitor’s voice, “I don’t know how much I’ll be able to see her today, but Mother Giselle promised to look after her, and she’ll be here for a couple of days. Hopefully Cassandra, sorry...Divine Victoria...will get a chance to breathe after tonight, it’s been a while since the four of us caught up.”

“Too long. You almost done?”

Her answer came in the form of Estelle, carrying her morning clothes under one arm, and a towel wrapped around her. Neither of them suffered from the shyness that so crippled their friend and soon-to-be leader. They were perfectly happy wandering around, taking their time and lending a hand where it was needed. When Leliana returned, Estelle was buttoning up her thick woollen undergarments. She had been spared the requirement of wearing the red and pink of the Chantry, and instead was in a dark purplish blue, the same as the Left Hand’s, so people knew who they were. The younger woman’s long chestnut-brown hair was curling this way and that, having been slightly dampened. It drove Estelle mad, it never did what she wanted. Leliana took it in her hand and tucked it behind her friend’s ear.

“We’re going to have to do something about that.”

Estelle snorted, “Good luck. It refuses to listen to reason. I should cut it down again really,”

“Leave it. Long hair highlights your face. I’m sure I can sort something out.”

Young Trevelyan was decidedly sceptical, but if the Nightingale wanted to try, she wasn’t about to stop her. She carried on with her preparations, pulling the chainmail over her head and arms, she was briefly called upon to help with Leliana’s cuirass, a favour that was returned. The pair of them stood side by side, looking in the mirror above her dressing table. They were still barefoot and ungloved, but they still turned from side to side, inspecting themselves from different angles.

“It’s lighter than I thought it would be,” pointed out Leliana, “I wonder what Harritt used?”

“No idea. But he knows we need speed more than bulk, so I’m not surprised.”

“I think I’ll need more bulk for that hair of yours. And possible another drink. Now sit.”

Estelle saluted with a laugh, and perched on the edge of Leliana’s bed. The first thing she did was start brushing it out, with a mouthful of grips. Estelle couldn’t help but laugh at the image she saw in that mirror across from them.

“Oi, keep still,” scolded Leliana in a slightly impeded voice.

“Sorry. You’re just, reminding me a lot of Lorelai,” explained the client.

“That’s your sister, isn’t it?” few people knew much about Estelle before she had fallen out of the Fade.

“Yes, the middle child, but a few years older than me. Whenever we had to go to some family gathering or important shindig, she’d get me up in the early morning and plonk me in her room until I looked vaguely respectable. She was the only one in the family who was patient enough to put up with me,” Estelle smiled, a little sadly.

“You miss her?”

“Horribly. We’ve always been very close. We’d fight like cat and dog growing up, but forgive each other just as quickly. Especially when Kendrick tried to boss us around.”

“Your brother I presume?”

“That’s right. Even when we were very small he always tried to boss us around and tell us what to do, felt it was his duty as the only male and heir to the Trevelyans. Lorelai and I soon set him straight,” Estelle looked wistful for a moment, “But thankfully he’s calmed down a lot since he married Annie.” She was quiet for a little while as Leliana started doing some kind of twist in her hair, “My parents are looking to marry Lorelai off. She wrote me the other day. Poor thing is terrified and miserable. Everyone’s ganging up on her. I wish I could help.”

“Why can’t you?” asked Leliana, “I’m sure Cassandra would be happy to find a reason for her to visit Val Royeaux.”

“You think?”

“Of course. It’s your family. I know a lot of people who would want to assist you in helping them.”

Estelle seemed cheered, “Maybe I’ll ask. If not, I’ll get her here myself. You’d like her.”

“I’m sure I would.”

“What about you Leliana? Any siblings? I realise I’m going on about my life and I don’t know much of yours.”

Leliana hesitated for a moment, “No...it was just me. I never knew my father, and my mother died when I was young. Her friend took me in for a while, until she died too.”

“Oh, Maker. Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”

“It’s fine. You didn’t know. I had friends that were like siblings, but…”

Estelle sensed she had touched a nerve, and felt badly about it. She turned around to face the other woman, and squeezed her hands reassuringly. Leliana seemed grateful for the simple gesture. She hadn’t thought about Tug and Sketch for some time, she had bottled it away with the rest of her past. She allowed herself a moment of reflection, before pulling herself together, and easing a little of Estelle’s hair out of it’s binding, so ringlets framed her face. It struck her, looking at her young friend, that maybe she was starting to seem like a sibling too. They had become quite close working with each other in the Inquisition, and even more so since they had joined Cassandra in Val Royeaux. As if reading her mind, Estelle gave her a gentle hug.

“One can never have enough sisters, you know,” she smiled.

Leliana chuckled, and the pair of them looked around as there was a knock at the door. Curious, Leliana frowned. She hadn’t been expecting any company. She wandered over, and turned the handle. As the door opened, a red-faced messenger looked extremely relieved.

“Sister Nightingale! It’s good to see you,” he had been all around the Cathedral, “I don’t suppose you know where Lady Trevelyan has gone?”

“I’m right here,” Estelle raised a hand and stood up, walking over, “What seems to be the problem?”

The messenger gulped, and loosened the neck of his shirt, “Um, it’s...Her Holiness. She’s...uh...barricaded herself in her quarters.”

“Oh my,” Leliana breathed, looking at Estelle,

“She refuses to let anyone in, but word is, she always listens to you. Mother Giselle sent people everywhere to find you.”

Estelle sighed, “Tell her I’m on my way.”

“Yes My Lady,” the messenger bowed and hurried off.

Estelle made her way back in the room, strapping her holsters to her legs, and pulling on her boots. As she wriggled her hands into her gloves, Leliana passed over her daggers, and she gave a grateful nod and smile as she attached them. She thought for a moment, then grabbed the bottle of mead from the side,

“Mind if I take this?”

“You need it more than me,”

“Not so much me as Cassandra.”

“Good luck.”

“That I _will_ need. Can I find you later? I still keep getting those last couple of our lines mixed up.”

“Of course. See you then.”

Estelle gave her a wave, and disappeared out into the tower. Leliana sent a quiet prayer after her, and did not envy the position one bit.

 

 

 

 


	2. Two

As Estelle made her way through the Cathedral, tongues started wagging and whispers were spoken behind hands. She was unsure as to whether the things they were saying were bad or good. She was still quite a peculiar entity to most. A Free Marcher from a minor noble family, championed as the Herald of Andraste herself, and now, she was to reduce herself to serving under a new and unsure Divine in a crumbling Chantry. They didn’t know that to her, it was in no way a reduction. It was a relief, a duty, and a pleasure. She would always support her friends when they needed her. Which was why she was briskly walking to the Divine’s quarters. When she arrived, half a dozen or so anxious pairs of eyes turned to her. Each one was carrying an array of different things, and sighed.

“Maker’s breath,” she murmured to herself, then stopped in the middle of the crowd, “What seems to be the problem?”

She wished she hadn’t asked. She was bombarded with panicky requests and requirements, and innumerate different explanations. Estelle had the patience to sift through them, but she knew it was no wonder Cassandra had had enough. Swiftly and strategically, she received step by step instructions about exactly what was needed, when and where. She ended up carrying an awful lot of things, and all of them were still staring at her.

“Get back to your duties, Ladies and Gentlemen. I will be sure to send you a messenger should you be required.”

Doubtful, but never the less relieved, and grumbling about “unsuitable for purpose”, “unstable” and “too hot tempered” to one another. Estelle sighed and drew her spare hand across her face. It hurt her to hear people accuse her friend so, when they didn’t know her, but she had to admit, Cassandra wasn’t really helping herself at the moment. Gingerly, she knocked on the door.

“Go away, I’m praying!” came the angry, slight door-muffled response.  
“Cassandra. It’s me.”  
“Estelle?”

She heard movement in the room, and moments later, the door was opened. Cassandra stood in front of her. Estelle was astounded at just how pale and worn out she looked. She was quite convinced too, that she seemed thinner than usual. Silently, Cassandra motioned Estelle in, and then promptly locked the door behind them. Estelle was amazed every time she visited her, how grand and plush the whole suite was. It was completely different from her and Leliana’s modest but comfortable rooms, and little living room. Cassandra looked completely out of place in it, and had made no attempt at all to personalise it.

“So...things not going well?”  
“Ugh,”

Cassandra pulled a disgusted face, and then walked over to her bed, falling front-first on to it, and burying her head in the pillows. Estelle looked around for space, and there was plenty of it. She placed the various boxes, garments and letters she was juggling on a huge chantry-red armchair. That done, she wrestled off her boots, and sat next to Cassandra on the bed, resting her head on the other pillows, and her hands on her stomach.

“Well at least the bed’s comfy.”  
“All the better to hide in and never come out,” Cassandra’s muffled voice commented into the pillow.  
“Asking if you’re ok would be really stupid at this point, huh?”  
Cassandra still hugged the cushions underneath her, “Tell you what. You be Divine and I’ll be your Right Hand, or we could both just jump out of that window and run to the Anderfels.”  
“In my new boots? Harritt would never forgive me.”  
“Your armor suits you well,” commented Cassandra.  
“Thank you,” She gently grabbed the back of her friend’s shirt, and pulled her over, so they were side by side, “Now. Talk to me.”  
“I will. But right now, can you just be here?”  
“Of course.”

Estelle leaned her head on her hands, staring up at the intricate designs on the canopy. Cassandra could already feel herself calming down, although her heart was still racing at least she could hear herself think. Just a few moments later, Estelle realised with a smile she had, in fact, fallen asleep. Thankfully the ceremony wasn’t until later that evening, so she had time. She quietly crept over to the door, unlocking it and poking her head around. A young maid was coming by, and she waved her over.

“Excuse me, you there?” called the woman in a whisper. The girl looked around and then pointed at herself questioningly, “Yes. What’s your name?”  
“Merryn, My Lady,” the poor girl looked terrified to be addressed by a person in such a position of power, she was certain she was in trouble and trembled.  
Sensing her unease, Estelle gave her her warmest smile, “It’s ok. I just need your help Merryn,”  
“Of course My Lady,” Merryn curtsied, relieved.  
“I need you to go to the kitchen for me. Ask for some fresh porridge, honey, and any soft berries you can. Tell them it’s for The Divine, and if they question it, say it’s on my orders. Bring it straight here. Anyone tries to give you grief, they answer to me. Alright, Merryn?”  
“Right away, My Lady.”  
“Here, just between you and me, ok?” she pressed a gold coin into the amazed girl’s hands, and winked.  
“Th...thank you!”

The girl ran off, and Estelle returned to the room. Cassandra was still dozing, so she left her to it, and instead began working on the large list of requirements that she was supposed to be doing. Some of them were utterly ridiculous, some irrelevant, and some she knew Cassandra didn’t know much about yet. No wonder she was so stressed out. She nabbed a corner of the desk and perched on it, looking around for pen and ink. Once she wrestled one out, she started patiently going through every page, making annotations and giving explanations of certain things. She was nowhere near as well versed in combat, battle plans and Chantry life as Cassandra, but when it came to people, politics, and the perhaps less savoury characters in Thedas, she had been well trained as Inquisitor. Josephine had carried on teaching her who was who, and where they crossed each other’s paths, and Cullen had been very helpful in finding links in the dark underbelly of Thedas. She may have been naturally shy around large groups of people, but she still knew the whole life stories of everyone she encountered. It helped that she had a sympathetic face, and people often found themselves talking to her about their problems anyway, from the highest to the lowest.

“Gah!” Cassandra suddenly awoke, a nightmare had weaved it’s tendrils into her mind, and she couldn’t shake it.

She was momentarily confused when she saw her friend by her desk, a pile of papers in front of her. Her sudden cry had made the woman jump, and she had instinctively reached for her daggers. She breathed out and sheathed them again when she realised there was no enemies in the room. Physical ones, at any rate. She sat next to Cassandra once more, and tilted her head inquisitively.

“Bad dream?”  
“As always,” sighed Cassandra,  
“So that’s why you haven’t been sleeping then?”  
“How did you know that?”  
“Please. It’s written all over your face, and I can read you like you read one of Varric’s novels. Um, sort of...” she giggled embarrassedly when she remembered which series was Cassandra’s favourite. Thankfully, she was saved by a knock at the door, “Come on in Merryn, it’s ok.”

Cassandra tried to at least look a bit like she hadn’t just woken up from a nightmare and then inadvertently been compared to romance novel, when a young girl came in with a tray. Estelle motioned for her to set it on the bedside table, and she did so. She gave a low curtsy to The Divine and silently left the room.

“What’s this?” Cassandra looked sceptical,  
“This, is going to stop you from passing out tonight. When did you last eat something?”  
Cassandra waved it off, “I haven’t kept much down for a while.”  
Estelle put an arm around the woman’s shoulders, and pulled her into a hug, “Why didn’t you come to me sooner?”  
Cassandra shrugged, “I was busy. You were busy.”  
“I am never too busy to see you, Cassandra Pentaghast. Haven’t you learned that by now? Get that down you, before I have to force feed you myself,”  
“You couldn’t,” retorted Cassandra,  
“The state you’re in Your Holiness, Merryn probably could.”

It was a fair point, and Cassandra couldn’t contest it. She had been feeling constantly sick and nervous every since they had gotten to Val Royeaux. She had desperately wanted to seek out her friends the closer her ordination came, but every time she so much as tried to breathe in their direction, she was whisked off to undertake another duty or to sign another letter. It was relentless, and the more isolated she was from them, the worse she had felt, until she snapped, which had resulted in today’s barricade. Estelle felt guilty that she hadn’t tried harder to get to her, and vowed that it would change from then on. She was already plotting routes out in her mind, places away from prying eyes where they could meet up, and just be.

After the initial two bites that made her stomach churn, Estelle’s quiet but relentless coaxing made her realise how hungry she was, and she wolfed down the whole bowl. As she did, she started to feel a bit more human. Thankfully, Merryn was a bright girl, and had also managed to rustle up some cheese, crackers and fruit. They too disappeared, with a lot of gratitude.

“What was that girl’s name again?” asked Cassandra,  
“Merryn,” Estelle smiled.  
“I’ll see she gets rewarded. You could always use an assistant, right?”  
“Me?”   
“Yes. I already have you and Leliana, but I think if you take her under your wing, it might be a very good thing.”  
“I, guess?” Estelle had never considered herself old enough to ‘take somebody under her wing’, she was still learning every day, but the girl did have a nice nature about her.

The Trevelyan was relieved as a little colour came back to her friend’s cheeks, she seemed a lot livelier than before, and looked positively delighted as her Right Hand discreetly withdrew a small bottle of mead from her boot. She fetched two tumblers, and Estelle filled them up. Cassandra wandered over to the desk, peering down at the stack of papers.

“What were you doing with all this?”  
“Oh! That!” Estelle stood beside her, “I took note of what needed doing today from the people outside. I realise you have a lot on your plate at the moment, so I tried to help out a bit. The different marks mean the topics relate to each other, and I annotated some bits that were worded poorly, so it made more sense.”  
“I take it you picked all this up from Josephine?”  
Estelle had the decency to blush slightly, “Yes. You see here, I did a glossary, and a few extra explanations...I, er, hope you don’t mind?”  
Cassandra picked up the sheaf and inspected it, “Mind? You just completely translated what might as well be Ancient Elvish to me, and I actually understand it. I can’t thank you enough.”  
“Just doing my duty, Your Holiness,” Estelle saluted,  
“As friend or Right Hand though? Either way you’ve done a fine job.”  
“Well, I’m both really, aren’t I? And I’m damn good at it.”  
Cassandra smiled, a proper smile that hadn’t crossed her face in a long time, “Yes, you really are.”

The pair of them sat down, and Estelle patiently went through all the notes with Cassandra, and answered all of her questions as best she was able. The soon-to-be Divine couldn’t quite get over how much easier everything could have been if she’d been allowed to actually see her advisors from the start. It made her angry, but then she listened as Estelle calmly clarified yet again a certain noble relationship, and it subsided. The pain in her head however, didn’t. After a while, she winced and rubbed her temples. Nothing she’d done had shifted it.

“Headache?” queried Estelle,  
“Dreadful.”  
“It’s probably tension. I can help if you like.”  
“I don’t know if you can. Nothing the healers gave me has worked.”  
“Oh, you don’t need pills and potions. But you will need to let me actually get at your back and shoulders,” she pointed out,  
“What? Why?” Cassandra was incredibly bashful when it came to such matters.  
“Because I can’t find pressure points in metal,” she knocked on the back of Cassandra’s cuirass.  
“Pressure points?”  
“Yes. It’s a trick my mother taught me. My father was a soldier, until he got thrown from his horse to save his troops, and injured his back. He used to get terrible pains, all the way through his body. It’s all connected you see. A pain in your leg, might actually be stemming from your neck, or somewhere completely different.”  
Cassandra was still hesitant, “You know all this? You’ve done it before?”  
“No, I’m just going to randomly mangle your neck and hope it helps,” Estelle rolled her eyes, “But in all seriousness, yes. When I was nine, I found father collapsed in the stables. He was in so much pain he couldn’t move, so I had to get maman. I immediately demanded that she teach me what to do, so next time, I could help him.”

The little glimpse of insight into a younger Estelle’s life convinced Cassandra that her friend was telling the truth. She sighed, resigned to accepting the help. She still didn’t feel completely comfortable however. They were very close friends, but Cassandra had never been that close to anyone. Until now, it would seem.

“Look, I’ll turn around and close my eyes. You can sit on the chair, or the bed, or wherever, and cover up if you like. It’s just me, ok? We’ve shared tents before now.”  
“Yes. But they were dark.”  
“It’s only your back, don’t worry.”

It was precisely that which was worrying Cassandra. Estelle soon realised why as she returned from grabbing untouched essential oil from some kind of ‘Welcome to Divineship’ starter pack. At the top of Cassandra’s back, and presumably stretching down, though they were covered by a towel, were numerous criss-crossing scars of varying intensity. The woman was completely silent and she stared down at the floor. Estelle knew better than to ask or hesitate. It was something very private to her friend, it had been a big enough step for her to let her see them, she wasn’t about to make her relive them too. Instead, she quietly took off her gloves and pushed back her sleeves. The second Estelle’s hands touched her back, Cassandra instinctively flinched. She stopped for a moment to let her calm, before ever so softly running her fingertips over them. She felt the jagged edges and the scar tissue around them, but ignored them, instead focusing on what her mother had shown her.

Once Cassandra relaxed, the effect was almost instant. Estelle worked steadily, easing out knots and stretching scrunched muscles. She very carefully found certain parts under her shoulder blades and in her neck, and applied pressure, until she could feel the tension dissipate. Cassandra closed her eyes, starting to feel better than she believed she had ever felt before. She had even temporarily forgotten all about the scars. Her masseuse noted this and smiled. She sent a mental thank you to her mother, and after a while, kindly pulled the towel up to recover the marks again. She rested her hands on her friend’s shoulders.

“Better?”  
“I can’t find the words.”  
Estelle chuckled, and wrapped her arms around Cassandra’s neck, leaning her head on the woman’s, “See, told you I was damn good.”  
Cassandra patted the woman’s arm gratefully, “Thank you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know some of the first two chapters have been a bit feels-heavy, but I promise there's lighter coming!


	3. Three

As Estelle made her way back towards her own quarters from Cassandra’s, her attention was caught mid way across the cloister where the library was kept. She wasn’t quite sure what was happening, until a rush of blue and gold bundled in to her, almost knocking her off her feet. When she realised what was going on, she laughed with delight, picking up the blue and gold blur, and spinning her around. The bundle squealed, quite taken aback by how much stronger Estelle had gotten.

“Josie! I wasn’t expecting you for an age yet!” Estelle buried her head in her partner’s shoulder, hugging her tight and kissing her. She didn’t care in the slightest if people gave them sideways glances and narrowed eyes.  
“I know, sorry. But I couldn’t wait that long,”  
“My love, the last thing you need to do is apologise.”

The last thing Estelle was going to do was let Josephine go for even a second. She stood hugging her for quite some time, and when she finally relented, Josephine held her hand. It was a relief to see her still standing, even though she looked tired. Estelle picked up Josephine’s modest luggage with ease, and hand in hand, they made a leisurely stroll through the Cathedral, on a sort of semi-tour. They were both glad she had arrived early, it meant they had more time with one another, and also immediately brought to an end any of Estelle’s nerves.They were talking animatedly the whole way, catching up on every little detail of the time they’d spent apart. When they eventually got to the quarters designated to Cassandra’s Hands was the only time they stopped. That was only to let Josie settle in and get freshened up.

“They won’t mind me staying with you, will they?” asked Josie hesitantly, “It’s not too improper, distracting the Right Hand?”  
“It’s already been cleared with the boss,” Estelle grinned, “And I’d like to see anyone try and challenge her.”  
“It’s so strange, isn’t it? Cassandra suddenly being your leader, and The Divine, no less.”  
“Strange is an understatement. Was it really only a year ago we were in Skyhold, just starting to rebuild it?”  
“Well, you did a fine job of that. I’m sure The Chantry will fare as wonderfully with the three of you at it’s helm.”  
“Maybe you should tell Cassandra that. She’s pretty convinced she’s going to fail utterly.”  
“Poor thing,” cooed Josephine sympathetically.

There was a knock at the door, and Estelle knew immediately who it would be. She opened it and stepped aside, waving a beaming Leliana into the room. She laughed and shook her head as the two of them started hugging, squealing and jabbering excitedly. She loved seeing how happy they were when they met up, and was quite content to give them their own space to catch up, even if it was technically her room. She was not a jealous or clingy person, like some people she had been acquainted with in the past were. There had been one girl, Adeline, when Estelle was a girl in Val Royeaux, who threw a hissy fit if she so much as talked to somebody else for more than five minutes. It was unbearable, because Estelle had the misfortune of sharing a room with her. She had vowed never to suffocate somebody like that. She had also been present when one or two of Lorelai’s suitors tried to break her and her sister up and make her spend all her time with him. On reflection, Estelle thought, Lorelai had never had much luck with relationships. Perhaps that was a contributing factor that had swayed Estelle more to enjoying the company of women.  Her attention was drawn back to the others by the mention of her name. She turned to see what it was about, and realised Josephine was admiring the back of her hair.

“You have to teach me how to do that Leliana,” pleaded Josephine, “Ellie is marvellous when it comes to helping me, but neither of us get very far with hers.”  
“You can blame my genetics for that.” Estelle smiled and wandered back over. “But even the Trevelyan mane cowers in front of The Sister Nightingale.”  
“Of course it does. Fear me,” Leliana put on her angriest face...and Josephine and Estelle fell about laughing. She sighed, “Once upon a time that would have worked. You two have made me go all soft.”  
“And you’re much happier because of it,” pointed out Josephine. “Smiles before knives.”

Estelle bit her lip to stop laughing again. She was remembering when Leliana had mimicked Josephine perfectly, saying those exact words in the Rookery. Leliana noticed and gave her a warning glance. She was mostly worrying she would giggle too.

“Anyway. How fares her Holiness now?” queried the Left Hand, “You were gone for a few hours.”  
“Well, she’s remembered how to breathe. I also translated all the files people had thrown at her. Honestly, you’d think people that worked in The Grand Cathedral would have a better grasp of grammar and penmanship...” she stopped, aghast, “I...think I just turned into Josephine.”  
Josephine gave her arm an indignant slap, but it hurt her hand more, her partner’s arm felt like pure muscle now. Estelle feigned woundedness, before laughing again. “You know I love you really Josie.”  
“You better.”

To prove herself, Estelle embraced the woman and kissed her, and Leliana politely looked away, although she was secretly pleased the two of them were so happy. Estelle noticed this and looked at her.

“Oh, I’m sorry, are you feeling left out?” Estelle made a motion as if to kiss Leliana, then ducked and hugged her instead, never the less, Leliana went bright pink.  
“Estelle Rosaline Trevelyan, behave yourself!” scolded Josephine, “Don’t tease the poor woman.”  
“Sorry Ma’m,” Estelle saluted, but her eyes were still twinkling with mischief.  
“Rosaline?” Leliana had no idea,  
The woman pulled a face, her middle name was far too girly for her taste, “Yes. I rue the day I ever let that little fact slip to Lady Cherette over here.”  
“I think it’s pretty,” disagreed Leliana.  
“Me too!”  
“Anyway,” interrupted Estelle. “Fancy quizzing us on our lines Josephine? Or, well, just me, with some prompting. I’ve never had to memorise a speech before.”  
“What, so all those grand words at Skyhold were all off the cuff?” Leliana didn’t believe it.  
“Well, yes. It’s easy when you’re doing it from yourself, not a parchment.”  
“May I have a look?” Estelle shrugged and grabbed the papers off the side, handing them over. Josephine scrolled through them, and as she got towards the end, she started smiling, “You need to look at it differently Ellie.”  
“What do you mean?” She leaned her chin on Josephine’s shoulder, peering over it.  
“See here, all this stuff about serving the Divine, seeking out the poor, weak and lonely. Put it in context.”  
“Huh?”  
“Your best friend is the Divine. You saved thousands of people with the Inquisition. You’re pledging yourself to support Cassandra, to help her and carry on what you’ve already been doing. Just with upgraded armour.”  
“That is an excellent point,” agreed Leliana as she read over it again.

Estelle frowned, taking the papers back, and started flicking through them as she paced the room. She started mouthing the words to herself, and Josephine and Leliana glanced at each other. Estelle started smiling, and her walk was more enthusiastic the more she read. Leliana motioned to Josephine, and they left her in peace, taking a shortcut through the door that connected Leliana and Estelle’s rooms directly. It could be locked from either side, but neither of them ever bothered. They were always seeing each other and spending time with one another anyway.

The two of them perched on a sofa across the room, and looking out on to the balcony. Josephine gratefully accepted the offered wine, staring thoughtfully out over the window. The Grand Cathedral was a beautiful place. She was glad she would be able to see more of it, and even happier that she could spend more time with her lover, but a shadow crossed her face, and it caused Leliana some concern.

“Poor Estelle,” Josephine shook her head, “I’ve never seen her so anxious before.”  
“Is it that bad?” Leliana knew she was a little nervous, but had not realised to what extent.  
“Yes. I could tell right away. This whole thing means a lot to her. She’s absolutely terrified of letting everyone down, because she’s nowhere near as experienced as most other people, and she doesn’t want to be judged on her age. She doesn’t think she’s good enough. I don’t know how many times I had to talk her back into accepting the position.”  
“She’s incredibly good at hiding it,” commented Leliana.  
“Of course she is. It was how she was brought up, and how she had to be for the Inquisition. If you get any glimpses in her life at all, you’re the lucky one. She trusts you enough to let you into that, and she will be fiercely loyal to you.”  
Leliana reflected on the conversation they had had earlier in the morning, “She was talking to me about her sister before you arrived,”  
Josephine looked impressed, “Wow. She must really trust you.”  
“But then, why didn’t she tell me about her concerns?”  
“She doesn’t like to trouble people. It took me a long time to get passed that wall.”

Leliana was seeing Estelle in a very different light, and with a growing respect. She was always so happy, and optimistic. She was the most kind and selfless person the bard had ever come across. Hearing that she was just like everyone else inspired her to try and get passed those walls too, like she was helping Leliana to break down her own. It felt like the right thing to do. She didn’t have much time to consider however, as the woman in question burst through the door, grinning away. She almost knocked both of them off their seats, hugging them with an arm each. She planted a smooch on Josephine’s cheek for good measure.

“Josie, you’re a miracle worker! It’s so easy now! Go on Leliana, test me!”

Unable to resist her energy, Leliana chuckled. Estelle pulled Josephine on to her lap and hugged her, looking at the spymaster like a puppy searching for a treat. As she was bidden, Leliana picked out various bits of text, and got Estelle to finish them. After a while, she was completely wordperfect. Josephine’s trick had really worked, and it filled her with energy. She would serve and protect Cassandra, she would bring hope to the hopeless, and she would help restore order in the chaos that was Southern Thedas, and she wasn’t afraid of it any more. Her new found confidence seemed to radiate off her. Tiring of practice, the three of them took advantage of the last few hours before everything kicked off, talking and laughing, catching up with people. They sorely missed Cassandra’s company, but she had very important things to be doing. The time went so quickly they didn’t notice. Eventually their revelry was ended by the sound of footsteps outside the door, followed by a knock.

Leliana stood up, stretched and went over. When she opened it, a smiling older woman stood their expectantly, “Mother Giselle, how lovely to see you. You didn’t need to come all the way up here,”

“Thank you for your concern my dear, but I wanted to see you both in person before things began. I’m sorry to interrupt your reunion, but it is time we started heading to the main Cathedral.” She spotted Josephine as her and Estelle came over, “Ah, my dear Lady Montilyet, how wonderful to see you.”  
Josephine reached forward and planted a kiss on the old woman’s cheeks, “And you, Revered Mother.”  
“I hope my company this evening does not wear on you too much, I know I don’t have as much energy as these young ladies here.”  
“Not at all Mother Giselle, I will be glad of it. Shall we go?” she cast a hesitant glance at Estelle,  
Mother Giselle smiled, “Go ahead my dear. It’s hardly a secret now, is it?”  
Josephine blushed,  but nodded, and hugged Leliana goodbye, then hugged and planted a kiss on Estelle’s cheek, “You’ll be fine my love. We shall see you later.”

The pair left, and Estelle’s nerves came back, hitting her full force in the stomach. Leliana didn’t question it when she turned ashen, and ran in to the washroom. She still had on her mind what Josephine had said to her earlier. She followed her young friend, and found her hanging on to the sink for dear life, clearly having just finished retching. She rubbed the girl’s back to ease it, and Estelle practically sunk in to her.

“It’s all well and good knowing my lines,” she croaked, “But I don’t think the Grand Clerics will forgive me if I throw up on them.”  
“It’s alright, Estelle. I’ll be up there with you. You can do this, I promise you can.”

Estelle didn’t say anything, still not really believing it. Instead she hugged her friend, burying her head in her neck and clutching her tightly. At that moment, the Left Hand felt very protective of the Right, and it cemented her own fervour. If she could help this young woman through something as huge as this, supporting her, and their Divine in the face of the highest orders of Andraste, and the chaos in the world, her faith had truly returned to her. She tenderly washed the girl’s face, and straightened out her hair and clothes, resting her hands on her shoulders.

“Come on Lady Trevelyan. We have a close friend out there who needs us.”

This seemed to hearten Estelle, and the pair of them eventually wandered out into the corridor and towards the Main Cathedral, though Estelle was still very discreetly holding her companion’s hand for moral support.


	4. Four

A small group of people were all waiting in the vestry behind the Sunburst Throne, and a huge group was waiting outside.The whole Cathedral and it’s courtyard were full to bursting, there wasn’t more than a few inches of space between everyone there. It was hot, and loud, and the air buzzed with excitement and expectation. The main chamber where the throne sat was full of people who had been able to get there early enough, but there was standing room only. Except if you happened to be lucky enough to earn a place in the alcove. But that was only for the most important figures of the Chantry, and senior Chantry sisters.

The group in the vestry consisted of half a dozen of the most elite guards, a senior Cleric that was to be the Speaker, elected on behalf of the people, and two women in matching armour, standing by the door. They looked completely calm and serene, a completely different scene from what it had been earlier. There was complete silence, but it was obvious that even the Speaker deferred to the senior power they had. They were to stay right behind Cassandra in the procession, so they could keep an eye out and provide the highest level of safety to The Divine. It was her that they were waiting on now, before everything began.

There was a discreet murmur in the tenseness that was that room, as the door opened. Silently, Cassandra entered, and her friends couldn’t get over how different she looked. She stood tall as ever, and was utterly striking. She had donned beautiful black velvet robes, with gold stitching and detail, more simple that previous Divines. She had also been spared the ‘silly hat’, though her braid was gone and her short hair had been tidied, she was bare-headed. A thousand things were spinning around in her head, and her heart was racing so fast she feared it might explode. There was no end to her relief, when the first faces she saw were those of Estelle and Leliana. She instinctively reached forward, and Estelle took her hands without saying anything. They were warm and supportive and her bright smile and new armour sparkling in the candlelight, brought her some comfort in the dim vestry. Satisfied she was calm enough, Estelle stepped backwards.

“Your Holiness,”

The Trevelyan gave a low bow, and everyone else in the room followed suit, echoing her greeting. They parted to let her get through to the Speaker, who spoke to Cassandra in a low, supportive voice. He was quite an old gentlemen, but still standing tall and proud. His eyes were kind and they reminded the people in the room of their fathers. He took his time with the soon to be Divine, explaining things to her, with a little extra support from Estelle, who Cassandra had managed to call over with simply an expression.

“Are you ready, Your Holiness?” questioned the Speaker.  
Cassandra sighed, “As I’ll ever be.”  
“It seems an age when you’re up there, but it’s not really that long,” he promised. “Sister Leliana, Lady Trevelyan, if you would?”

The two women took their place in the procession line, behind Cassandra, and a discrete signal from the Speaker at the front to the organist, cued their entrance. The aisle seemed a mile long, not helped by the painfully slow pace they were forced to go at in the name of tradition and respect. As Cassandra saw the Sunburst Throne, she felt the strong urge to pull back, but a quick glance over her shoulder to Estelle, who was almost close enough to touch, and a reassuring nod, propelled her onwards. She took a deep breath and gulped. When they finally arrived in front of the Throne, the guards peeled off and took their places at the front, leaving just the Speaker and Cassandra facing him, with Leliana on her left, and Estelle on her right. There was a fair amount of call and response between Cassandra and the Speaker, before she was called to kneel in front of him, it was time for her speech.

“I pledge myself to serve and care for the people of Thedas, in the name of The Maker, and his Prophet Andraste, who sacrificed herself for the sake of those who followed her. I promise to love and pray for those committed to their faith, to know them, and to be known by them,” her voice was slightly shaky, so she took a breath before continuing, “I promise to speak the name of the Maker, and spread the teaching of Andraste, to be merciful but firm, and to show compassion in discipline. I promise to care for the poor, the outcast, and those in need, seek out those who are lost and bring them home, and to forgive the sins of those who turn to faith. I pledge to proclaim the Gospel of Andraste, to follow her teachings, confront injustice and work towards righteousness and peace, the world over.”

The Speaker smiled as he responded, “We, the people, trust that you have weighed and pondered your words, and are determined to devote yourself to the service of Andraste and The Maker. We pray that you may offer to them your best powers of mind and spirit, so that as you follow the rule and teaching of our prophet, so you may grow into her likeness, and sanctify the lives of all with whom you have to do.” He couldn’t resist a little dramatic pause, before finishing, “I therefore declare you Her Holiness, Divine Victoria, the first of her name. May you live well, and live long, in Andraste’s light.”

The Speaker placed a skillfully wrought golden golden crown on her head, at her assistance the hat had been banished, and invited her to stand and face the people. As she did, there was a roar of approval and happiness, which even Leliana and Estelle joined in with. Cassandra focused on them, because it worried her less that she had the whole of Thedas to care for, when she had them by her side. It was their turn next, and Leliana gave her friend a slight nudge of encouragement. Thankfully, the Speaker informed them they could take their vows together, so neither one of them had to stand up there alone. The arrangement was slightly different this time, Cassandra stood in front of the Sunburst Throne, and the Speaker next to her. Estelle and Leliana were called to face them, again there was some exchange between them and the Speaker, before they each knelt on one knee, mirroring each other, in front of The Divine.They didn’t miss a single beat as they each covered their hearts with a hand, and began to recite their vows, in perfect time.

“I pledge myself to work with and protect Her Holiness, Divine Victoria, the first of her name, as she serves in the name of The Maker and Andraste. I will bring to the Chantry the needs and hopes of her people and I will help and defend Most Holy as she searches out the poor and weak, the sick and lonely and those who are oppressed and powerless. I will reach out into the forgotten corners of the world, that the light of Andraste may be made visible. I promise to guide and protect those who are searching for faith, and serve, obey and safeguard The Divine, without question, as her Hand. This I swear, upon my life and honour.”

The Speaker was quite impressed out how in sync the two were, and was satisfied that they would live up to their titles well. “We the people, bid you remember the greatness of the trust in which you are now to share: the ministry of Andraste herself, who for our sake was betrayed, and The Divine who guides all. Remember always the people whom you will protect, and may your faith and determination strengthen you, as we accept you as Right and Left Hands of The Divine.”

The Speaker passed Cassandra a medallion each for Estelle and Leliana, with the symbol of The Chantry engraved on it, and the relevant Hand each. Her hands lingered slightly on each of their shoulders as she hung them around their necks, and smiled. The Speaker stepped aside, allowing Cassandra to be the one that motioned for the pair to stand and turn to the crowd. There was a tremendous uproar as the people saw the leaders of their new Chantry, and with them the hope and promise that they brought. Clearly someone had been feeding back to the people waiting in the courtyard, because after a slight delay there was thunderous applause outside as well. Up in the alcove, the three of them caught sight of a very enthusiastic Josephine cheering them on, and Mother Giselle politely clapping whilst also trying not to laugh at her young companion.

The next order of business was greeting the crowds outside. The small party left the Throne Room, and made their way up the steps, and up to the grand balcony. The sun was only just setting, and torches lit up the balcony and courtyard, so everyone gathered could see their new Divine. Cassandra had to admit, she was quite proud to be standing there, even though her heart was still beating in her head. Glancing down at the thousands of people amassed suddenly made her position sink in. They were all looking to her for hope and guidance. She couldn’t bring herself to talk, so simply waved.

Something was stirring in the dark, however. Both Estelle and Leliana had started feeling uneasy since they left the throne room, and were acutely aware of how exposed they were right now. The pair shared a look, they seemed to have spotted the same thing. Lots of shadows between the torches and pillars. They instinctively scanned a side each, noticing a handful of people, who weren’t cheering. Then, a glimpse of something shining in the flames, a split second, and Cassandra suddenly found herself being grabbed by Estelle and shoved backwards, pinned against the wall, the woman so close she could feel her heartbeat, just as a crossbow bolt embedded itself in the pillar, exactly where Cassandra’s head had been.

“Leliana!” Estelle made some kind of signals with her hands, she had noted the location of the trouble.

It was utter chaos as a group of two dozen or so dissenters started shouting and protesting, waving weapons around. They were rounded up, half by Leliana’s Scouts, and half by Estelle’s Soldiers. Everyone in the courtyard started panicking, screaming and running. The would be assassin revealed himself, a tall, slim, middle-aged man with a scarred face and a hood. Another crossbow bolt sailed towards the Divine, but Estelle put herself in between her leader and the arrow, and winced as it sliced across her arm, as it flew, just below where the mail sleeves stopped. With her good arm, she threw her dagger, and it embedded itself right in the middle of the man’s throat. Blood gushed from the wound before two more soldiers wrestled the weapon away.

“Cassandra, are you ok?” Estelle held the woman’s shoulders, and an ashen Divine nodded in response.  
“I’m fine, but only because you got hurt…” she looked at Estelle’s wound and the younger woman smiled,  
“Just doing my job Your Holiness.” She stood up straight as a guard returned her dagger to her, thanking him with a nod, “Now, go and do yours.” She looked to the still frightened crowd in the courtyard. The perpetrators had been restrained, but that wouldn’t be enough.  
“But your arm,”  
“I’ll look after her, don’t worry,” assured Leliana. She got Estelle to sit down, leaning against the wall, and started cleaning the wound with a handkerchief, and Cassandra still looked doubtfully at them.  
“I don’t know what to say.”  
Estelle reached up with her good arm and squeezed her hand, “They were just attacked, and they’re scared. Pretend it’s me out there, or Leliana,  Josephine. Any one of us. What would you tell us, if we came to you terrified and looking for help?”

Cassandra nodded, and made her way to the end of the balcony. Looking down, the crowd had been restrained and gently guided by Chantry forces, but they were still trembling and crying, and everyone turned their heads to her in union, and a complete silence fell across the building.

“Cease your tears, my friends,” called Cassandra down to them, managing to project after years of practice training troops, “We must not let a few hold the rest of us hostage through fear. We have faced such a crisis before, and many other besides. We have conquered dragons, blights, civil war, a hole in the very sky above us, and we are all still standing. We will always stay standing,  because we are strongest together, and there are more of us than there are of them. I promised to protect you all, and by the Maker and Holy Andraste, I will. But I beg of you in return, trust in yourselves, and in your faith. Whatever is thrown at us, we shall not falter.”

She stopped, having managed to completely stun herself, not to mention Leliana and Estelle, who stared at each other with wide eyes. The silence lasted for a while, before a single soul, started to applaud, ignoring the pain that shot through her shoulder. The people around her followed suit, and then the courtyard below exploded in applause, cheering and whistling. Cassandra released a breath she didn’t realise she had been holding, looking over her shoulder at her Left and Right Hands, and truly beaming. Relieved, she rejoined her friends and protectors, dismissing the other Scouts and Soldiers. The only people she needed right then were the pair that had already more than proved themselves loyal and capable.

 

 


	5. Five

The three of them quietly made their way to Cassandra’s quarters, after a quick stop via the infirmary to get Estelle’s arm dressed, even though she complained mightily. She hated hospitals, they made her feel helpless and uncomfortable. She practically had to be restrained by the other two to let the healer get anywhere near her, and she shot out of the room once she was done faster than the crossbow that had injured her. The three of them went the long way to Cassandra’s, to avoid being sidetracked by anyone or anything. The assassination attempt would be dealt with another day. Once alone, the women gratefully stripped off their armour and robes respectively, happy to be back in their normal clothes, away from crowds, where they could be themselves.

“Well. They won’t forget your ordination in a hurry Cassandra,” pointed out Leliana.  
“I certainly won’t. It was incredibly rude of them to try and kill me less than an hour after I took office. I was expecting it further on down the line.” The other two laughed at her indignance. They all knew there would be threats, but they would deal with them. “I haven’t actually said thank you for saving my life, have I?” Cassandra turned to Estelle. “So, thank you.”  
“Not a problem. First war wound, woohoo. That means I’m all proper and titley now right?”  
“I suppose it does,” Leliana smiled.

They were interrupted by Josephine, bursting through the door without knocking. She immediately made a beeline for Estelle, and flung her arms around her neck. She was alarmed to find that as she held the woman, her shoulders were shaking and she was sobbing silently. Realising that Estelle was so firmly clasped by Josephine that she couldn’t make a move, Cassandra and Leliana slipped out on to the balcony. For once, Estelle had no idea what to do. She’d never seen Josephine crying quite like that before. She was so calm and collected usually, all her partner managed to do was kiss her and hug her until she could at least try to speak.

“They said you were hurt,” sobbed Josephine, “And then when I couldn’t find you…” Tears wracked her shoulders again.  
“Josie, it’s ok. I’m sorry I scared you…”  
“ _Scared_ me?!” now Josephine was angry, and pulled sharply away from her “I was _terrified_! I’ve never been so frightened in my life! The least you could have done was let me know you were alright! Maker only knows what might happen next time!”  
  
She had a very good point, and Estelle realised she should have tried to send at least a message. Even if things had escalated or went so quickly she barely knew what happened, she should have tried. It was a lesson well learned, and she wouldn’t forget it. At a loss, Estelle sunk to her knees in front of Josephine, who was staring so intensely at the floor it was the only way Estelle could get her to meet her eye. She grabbed the Antivan’s hands and kissed them. She’d been so wound up in her own fears and concerns all this time, she’d been selfish to Josephine’s own. Josephine was the one being left behind whilst the woman she loved went off galavanting and putting herself in all kinds of danger. She tried to put herself in the woman’s shoes, and she didn’t blame her at all.

“Josie...please. I’m so, so, sorry. I’ve been stupid, and selfish...I didn’t stop to think.”  
“No, you didn’t!”  
“I can’t say sorry enough...you have every right to be angry at me. Is there anything I can do? Anything at all? I can go out there and suggest a different Hand for Cassandra?”  
“Maker, no!” Josephine shook her head, “She needs you, and I could never put either of you in that position.”  
“Then what?”  
  
Josephine turned away for a moment, thinking of something. She walked a little off to one side, and Estelle stayed on her knees, she didn’t feel she had the right to stand up until she could make it up to Josephine. She watched nervously as the woman paced, sweat trickling down her back. Not even her arm hurt as much as her heart did then.

“Prove you won’t leave me alone. Prove you’ll come back, wherever you go and whatever you do.”  
“Of course...anything!” Estelle frowned, realising that though she meant it sincerely, she had no idea how to proceed, “Uhm, how?”  
Josephine knelt down facing Estelle, and held her hands, “Marry me.”  
“Come again?” this was definitely not the punishment she had expected. Or, any punishment at all, really.  
Josephine stood up, pulling Estelle up too, “Marry me.” She kissed her amazed partner, ”I’ve never loved anyone or anything so much as I love you, Estelle Rosaline Trevelyan. I want to be always with you, and I want you to always be with me, and this way, wherever we are, we can be.”  
“That’s an odd kind of penance…” it wasn’t that Estelle didn’t want to. She wanted nothing more in the world, but she wanted to check Josephine was sure.  
“I don’t want or need penance. I want and need you. Unless, you don’t…”  
  
In response, Estelle wrapped her arms around Josephine, kissing her so passionately they were stopped by hitting the wall, relatively hard, but they didn’t notice. They could talk about technicalities later on. But right then, all Estelle wanted to do was show Josephine all the words and emotion in her heart and head that she couldn’t get out without sounding ridiculous. After a few moments, they drew apart, breathless and with pounding hearts. It had almost slipped their mind they were in fact in The Divine’s chambers, and not their own, and they both couldn’t stop themselves from laughing, rather relieved they had remembered at last minute.

“Let me do this properly, minus the concussion…” Estelle straightened her clothes, and knelt down on one knee, taking Josephine’s hand, “Lady Josephine Cherette Montilyet,” she began, completely confident, “Would you do me the ultimate honour of agreeing to shape this mess of a girl into a respectable woman, and be my wife?”  
Josephine smiled the brightest, warmest smile Estelle had ever seen, “Of course.”

Estelle ignored the burning sensation in her arm, and whisked Josephine off her feet, spinning her around. Her delighted squeal drew the attention of their companions, and Cassandra and Leliana cautiously walked back into the room. The pair exchanged an utterly confused glance with each other as they saw what had initially been an angry, crying mess, into a couple absolutely radiating love and happiness.

“Is...everything ok?” ventured Cassandra, “We, heard a bang?”  
  
Estelle and Josephine both burst out laughing, which only served to add yet more befuddlement on to the poor bystanders. Leliana shrugged as Cassandra looked at her for answers, she really had no idea herself.

“Everything is amazing, My Lady,” responded Estelle with a bow, “I apologise for concerning you.”  
“OK girls,” Leliana put on her most direct ‘maternal’ voice, and folded her arms, “Just what is going on?” The two younger women looked at each other, and burst into peals of laughter yet again.  
It took them both quite a while to regain themselves long enough to speak, it was Josephine, being the diplomat that she was, who managed first. “Forgive me, but perhaps we can discuss it at another time. Divine Victoria has just been ordained after all, it is her evening.  
“Divine Victoria has had enough of her evening. Why do you think we came here instead of the banquet? Not to mention, my first assassination attempt also happened today. If there is something else that I can think about, I will welcome the distraction. So. Spill it,” ordered Cassandra.  
Josephine nudged Estelle forward, “She’s your best friend. You should tell her,”  
“But Leliana’s yours, you should tell her.” argued Estelle.  
“For the love of…!” Cassandra caught herself and cut her exasperation short, “ _Someone_ tell _somebody_ , _something_.”  
“Together?” suggested Estelle,  
“Together,” Josephine nodded.  
The two of them took a breath, and Cassandra and Leliana waited expectantly. “We’re getting married.”  
  
The utter astonishment of Leliana and Cassandra resulted in two smashed glasses, identical amazed looks and yet more giggling from the younger women. Neither of them had known their best friends to be completely speechless, let alone at the same time.

“Run that by me again?” Cassandra wanted to make sure she had heard everything perfectly.  
Estelle turned to her, beaming. “We’re getting married. Not right now, obviously. I have my duty to you to consider, Josephine told me as much herself, so you don’t need to worry about that.”  
“Worried?” Cassandra looked surprised, “I’m not worried. I’m delighted. I just have no idea how to respond.”  
“May I offer a tutorial?” suggested Leliana. She reached forward, and hugged her young friends tightly, an arm around each of them, “Congratulations. Nobody deserves to be happy more than the two of you.”  
“Thank you, Leliana,” Josephine kissed the woman’s cheek, “You’ll help us plan, right?”  
“Of course I will. I’d be honoured.”

The younger ones looked expectantly at Cassandra, who was still semi-frozen to the spot. They looked at each other, and decided to make things easier for her. Both of them hugged Cassandra, instead of her initiating it. To begin with she was quite stiff, but eventually relaxed, sinking in to it. As they released each other, Estelle kept hold of her hand.  
  
“I know it’s an unusual situation, two women getting married…” there were some implications that needed to be looked at.  
“I’ll preside over it myself, whether the Chantry like it or not,” assured Cassandra,  
“Thank you, Your Holiness.”  
“When it’s you, I prefer if you’d stick to Cassandra.”  
“Alright then. Thank you, Cassandra.”  
Cassandra noted the smashed glasses and spilled wine on the floor. Luckily, it was stone. “We should probably upgrade the drinks quality anyway, considering.”

It didn’t take long for Cassandra to call a servant, although the young elf was surprised when she helped him tidy up, and genuinely thanked him when he brought up the best wine they had. He was still looking rather dumbfounded at The Divine’s humanity as he left in a kind of daze, having been thanked in gold by Leliana. Cassandra poured four fresh glasses, and handed her gathered friends one each.

“To love,” Cassandra smiled, ever the romantic.  
“To friendship,” countered Estelle with a grin.

They clinked their glasses together and settled comfortably around Cassandra’s little table, as Josephine started dealing out cards.

 

 


	6. Six

The first order of business the following morning, was dealing with the consequences of the previous night. A group of assassins had somehow infiltrated the Grand Cathedral, and both Leliana and Estelle were furious they had gotten passed them. They needed to work out who sent them and where they came from. As Estelle got ready, she moved as quietly as she could, so as not to disturb Josephine. She couldn’t help but cast frequent glances at her fianceé’s sleeping face. She was loathe to leave. What she really wanted to do was crawl back into bed and curl up next to her, but she knew that was impossible. Instead she had to pull on her boots, strap on her armour, and work out who was trying to kill her best friend. She often felt she was living a double life, and it quietly tore her in two. She pressed a gentle kiss to Josephine’s forehead, and it caused her to stir.

“Ellie? It’s morning already?” her voice was croaky with sleep,  
Estelle brushed her hair away from her face, smiling down at her, “Yes, my love. But early. You should go back to sleep for a while. This is supposed to be a holiday for you, after all.”  
“But I always sleep better when you’re here.”  
“Same,” Estelle sighed, “But I have to go. I promise I’ll duck out as soon as I can, ok? I’ve asked Merryn to look after you whilst I can’t. She’s a sweet girl, you’ll like her.”  
“Hurry back, ok?” Josephine asked,  
“Of course,”   
Josephine caught her arm and pulled her down for a kiss, “I love you, Ellie.”  
“I love you too Josie.”  
  
Estelle kissed her back, and reluctantly tore herself away. She walked slowly, savouring the extra few moments of being in Josephine’s company. As she closed her door, Leliana was already standing in the hallway, leaning against the wall. She had obviously been waiting for her, and was about to tease her for being last up, until she saw the forlorn expression on her young friend’s face. She walked over to join her, and they headed to the stairs together. Part way down, Leliana suddenly spoke.

“It gets easier.” her voice was very matter of fact.  
  
Estelle stopped for a moment, and looked at her. Of course, if anyone knew how she was feeling, it would be the Nightingale. She had been with her Warden for closing in on eleven years, and had spent most of them apart from her. Estelle, still somewhat subdued, nodded, and carried on walking.

The pair of them made their way to the cells underneath the Cathedral. They had decided that it was in Cassandra’s best interest not to let her too close to the captives, even though they would be dead be either one of their hands if they had tried anything, the less Cassandra saw them, the less fuel for bad dreams. Many of them had had to be killed by the pair’s men, to save them harming innocents, but there were three in particular, who seemed to be the leaders, that were waiting for Leliana and Estelle.

“I’ve never interrogated someone before…” murmured Estelle hesitantly, “They were brought to me for judgement, yes, but…”  
Leliana had her professional face on, “I have. You can stand back, if you must.”

Estelle saw a slight flash of the Leliana that so many people feared in that comment. But she had also seen a flash of regret. It was not something she enjoyed, and only someone close enough to her would see that. Others pinned her as a ruthless spy, and, sometimes she had to be. Estelle felt rather guiltily, that she was glad she was the Right Hand. The second they stepped into the cells, she saw Leliana’s wall, her protection, go up. The way she looked, the way she spoke, even the way she walked. It was...dangerous. Leliana turned to one of the guards, demanding explanation without saying anything. The poor guard looked just as scared as her. He was young, but tall, and broad-shouldered. He was clearly a new recruit, and what a day to start.

“Name’s Wystan, Sister. Three men. Call themselves, ‘The True Believers’. They don’t like a shamed Seeker being in charge, and they really don’t like her leniency with mages.”  
“Divine Victoria was not a shamed Seeker,” responded Estelle pointedly.  
“Not my words, My Lady, I assure you. Anyway. The oldest is Lewin, fancies himself a hero. They don’t much like authority, and would see all it’s figures torn down and the people rule themselves. The other two, Payton and Winslow. They don’t say, anything really.”  
“Thank you,” Leliana’s voice was deadpan, “You may go.”  
“But, they said I should watch your back…” protested the Soldier.  
“I already have someone to do that, go.”  
  
Wystan glanced hesitantly over Leliana’s shoulder at Estelle, who could do nothing but shrug sympathetically, before he left. The two women closed in on the cell. It was small, and definitely not designed for three people. The older man, with a grim expression and a scar over one of his slate-grey eyes, sat on the plain wooden shelf that was meant to be slept on, and the other two, clearly brothers, but not necessarily related to him, were sat on the floor.

“Oh look. The Divine’s deadly little songbird,” taunted Lewin, “Come to sing me to death?”  
“That depends entirely on how things go,” Leliana casually unsheathed her knife, using it to clean under a nail.  
Lewin gave a short, cold, laugh, “Oh, and I see her little pet’s here too. What qualifies you to question me girl? Hm? This is not a game for children.”  
Estelle scowled, but noticed Leliana’s warning expression, so kept her mouth shut, save to defer to her, “I’m not doing the questioning. My colleague here is more than capable.”

Estelle respectfully stepped backwards, so Leliana could deal with him. Instead, she regarded the two young men. The one called Winslow was keeping himself into the corner, hugging his knees and staring at the floor. His blonde hair flopped over his face, and he seemed to like it that way. He fiddled uncomfortably with his sleeves, and Estelle could tell he was absolutely terrified. His older brother, Payton, caught the young woman staring at him and scowled, moving to stand protectively by him. Startled by the sudden movement, Winslow looked up, and noticed the curious green eyes that regarded him. He searched them for some kind of disgust, or rage, and didn’t find it. Winslow and Payton hadn’t wanted to join The Believers, they had merely gotten caught up in it through foolhardiness and bad luck. It seemed Estelle could sense this. All three of them were snapped out of their peculiar connection by an anguished cry.

“Bitch!” yelled Lewin.

From what Estelle could work out, he had lunged at Leliana through the bars, and as a result, her dagger had gone straight through his hand. Lady Trevelyan felt a little sick. She had never been particularly good with blood. Demon goo, beast skin, she could just about cope with. Human blood? Even her own made her queasy. Which was an odd flaw for a rogue to have. What had been assumed to be her arm paining her that turned her pale on the balcony the previous evening, was actually her reaction to the blood spurting out of the neck of the man who had her dagger embedded in him.

“I warned you,” Leliana’s voice was cold and sharp, “Now tell me how you got in, or you’ll lose it next time.”  
“You’re clutching at straw, Nightingale, and you have no idea it’s a viper.”

Lewin’s implications were clear. Inside job. Somebody in the Grand Cathedral had let them through, and that made things all the more difficult. Leliana angrily turned to Estelle, who immediately jumped to attention.

“Get the guards. Master Lewin is being transferred.”

Estelle knew what that meant. Clearly, so did Winslow and Payton. Payton still tried to act tough and protective, but even he looked afraid. She nodded, and sprinted up the steps three at a time. Not wanting to leave Leliana alone for long, she came back just moments later, with Wystan and a senior guard, both grim-faced. Lewin was swiftly grabbed and chained by them, and taken to another cell, further down, in the shadows. The Cathedral was a place of Worship, it didn’t have torture chambers, but something told Estelle they weren’t needed. She worried for Leliana, and the implications it would have on her, after she had just started coming out of her shell. A sudden alarm shot through Estelle’s thought process. She couldn’t let her do this. This was supposed to be a fresh start, for everyone. Urgently, she ran forward to the cell that still held Winslow and Payton.

“Lewin, is he a friend of yours?”  
The brothers looked at each other, before tentatively nodding, “He looked after us, when we were brought in,” murmured Payton in a deep voice.   
“But something’s changed in him,” Estelle was surprised that it was Winslow who took over.  
“He’s never normally like this, aggressive and...everything. I think he’s been scared into silence.”  
“Then we’re agreed. We have a mutual problem,”  
“Do we now?” Payton sounded sceptical.  
“Yes. You don’t want your friend tortured. I don’t want mine torturing. Do you know what he knows, and would you be willing to tell us? Divine Victoria is fair. She’ll hear your defense, and nobody needs to lose any limbs.” The two men looked unsure, but there was no time to waste, “You talk to me, he keeps his fingers, you get out of something you didn’t even want to be in in the first place, and I do my job. Do we have a deal?”

She stuck a hand through the bars as a gesture of goodwill, and after a moment, Payton shook it. Estelle bit her lip, then let herself into the cell with them. All three sat on the bed, they spoke and she listened. Winslow and Payton had been orphaned in The Blight. They survived by their wits and thievery. They had gotten quite settled in their lifestyle, even set up their own little thieves’ guild, earning a little status in the underworld of Ferelden. Everything was going well, until Corypheus. They had lost everything, again, and had to start from scratch. Unfortunately, their first target had ended up being the base of operations for The True Believers, who were revelling in the chaos and happy everyone was dead. They got caught and were to be executed, until Lewin stepped in on their behalf, and convinced them to join, even if just to save their own skins.

“And they started planning when they heard the Grand Clerics had named Divine Victoria?”  
Payton nodded, “They didn’t like it when they heard a young Free Marcher with no experience had managed to bring order into the chaos, and that one of the reasons the Chantry was being restored was him. That the Divine was supported by him.”  
“Her,” corrected Winslow, “It was a girl.”  
Estelle was glad just then they had no idea that young Free Marcher was her, “And that brought you here?” the pair nodded, “Who got you in?”

The two remained silent, but Payton eventually sighed, and extracted a letter that had been concealed in his shirt, passing it over. Estelle frowned, then opened it, and her heart sunk to her stomach. It was a letter of thanks, with instructions as to where the weakest points of the Cathedral were, and their plan of attack. As well as the contract on Cassandra’s life. She gave a brief thanks to the boys, hurriedly locked the cell behind them, for their own safety, and pocketed the key. She ran through the cells in the direction Leliana had gone. She arrived at the furthest and darkest, and was greeted by a startled Wystan and his superior. They were standing in front of a locked door, and stopped her as she blazed forward.

“Let me in!” she demanded,  
“Sister Nightingale’s orders, Lady Trevelyan. We let nobody in,” responded the older guard resolutely.  
“Let me in, or I let myself in. If she has an issue, she can take it up with me. Do you only listen to one Hand?”

The urgency and command she had managed to find in her voice, inspired the pair to part. She shot through the door, and slammed it behind her. The scene in front of her was not a pleasant one. Lewin was chained to the wall. He had a few more cuts and bruises, but nothing too serious. It seemed though that would have changed however, had she not chosen that minute to blunder in. Annoyed at the interruption, Leliana turned on her heel, dagger pointed at the person who had disturbed her, only to find that the throat it was pressing against, was Estelle’s. Now Estelle understood the pure terror someone might feel if faced with the formidable form of Leliana. For a moment, it seemed the Spymaster had completely forgotten where she was, and who she was threatening. Her eyes were glazed, her expression venomous, and her stance defensive. Trying not to gulp too much, as doing so would cause her to cut herself on Leliana’s dagger, Estelle shakily pressed the letter into her friend’s other hand.

“What’s this?” demanded Leliana, and then her eyes focused again, “Maker! Estelle! What are you doing here?!”  
“You...really didn’t know it was me?” croaked Estelle, immensely relieved when Leliana suddenly realised what she was doing and dropped the knife. Leliana couldn’t bring herself to admit that she really hadn’t. That would be a discussion for another time, “Read it.”

Even Lewin seemed to have lost his fight as he saw what was being handed over. His experience of the Left Hand, had prepared him to expect the worst when he had seen the Right. His energy left him, and he slumped. Leliana read the letter, then reread it. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing. Finding her courage again, Estelle spoke up.

“They said they’d testify, in front of The Divine...but we need to protect them.”  
Lewin suddenly perked up again, “They’re alive?! You didn’t…?”  
Estelle scoffed, “Of course not. Why would I? They pose no threat to me, they were simply scared, and tangled up in things much bigger than them. It happens to all of us at some point.”

Lewin regretted the way he had acted towards her before. Yes, she was young, but that had blinded him to the fact that she had a genuine, benevolent air about her. The way she spoke, she commanded a lot more authority and sensibility than he had initially accredited to her. Leliana noticed it too, and thanked The Maker for it.  
  
“Well, Lewin? Will you testify with them?” asked Estelle, meeting his eyes directly, “They believe you’ve been scared in to silence. How much is that silence worth?”  
Lewin looked deflated, “The others...said they’d kill the boys, if I said anything.”  
“I thought as much,” she turned to Leliana, “Well, Sister Nightingale. What now?”  
Leliana wasn’t stupid. She knew Estelle was deliberately giving her back control, but she wasn’t about to throw it back in her face, “I’m sure we can find somewhere for them. But they’ll  be heavily guarded. Nobody gets in, and they don’t get out.”

The arrangements were made, and Lewin, Payton and Winslow were escorted to a secure holding in the Cathedral, and the Hands had to go and inform The Divine what they had learned, without letting the guilty parties suspect they had been found out.

 

 


	7. Seven

It was whilst they were waiting in Cassandra’s office for her to arrive, that Leliana was struggling with a burning question, and leftover guilt from having almost harmed an innocent party, a friend who was trying to help.

“Leliana, you’ve been pacing for an age. What’s wrong?” sighed Estelle,  
Leliana immediately stopped herself. “How did you do it?”  
Estelle raised an eyebrow, “What?”  
“Get those boys to talk?”  
“It was simple. I just listened.”  
“But they didn’t say anything.”  
“You know better than even I do, that words count for very little when it comes to understanding somebody. You explicitly reinforced that in me in fact, at The Winter Palace. Remember the fancy buckles? Maker. You really _were_ a different person in there, weren’t you?”  
Leliana crossed her arms defensively, “Are you saying I’m incapable of doing my job properly?!”  
Estelle held up her hands in peace, biting her lip at her own callousness, “No, no. Heavens no. There’s nobody better than you at being you.”  
“Then just _what_ are you saying?”

Estelle pondered for a while. She felt like she was being pinned into a corner, trying to work out how to not upset Leliana and undo their closeness, and also wanting to be honest for her friend’s benefit. The woman was staring at her without blinking, and the Marcher sighed, nervously rubbing her neck and unable to meet her gaze.  
  
“If anything, I was worried about you.” Leliana relented slightly, to allow her friend a chance to explain, “The second we stepped off that last stair, there was just this, concrete wall. Poof. Appeared out of nowhere. Even your _face_ changed. I have no idea how, but it did. You were terrifying.”  
Leliana actually looked hurt, “You were scared of me?”  
“You did try and slit my throat,” she pointed out, and immediately regretted it when she saw the expression on Leliana’s face, hurriedly trying to backtrack, and mentally kicking herself at the same time. “I wasn’t scared of _you_.”

Again she was struggling to find the right words, she loathed being put on the spot, but realised her insensitive remarks had wedged her foot firmly in her mouth, and only she could be blamed for it.

“But that wall. That wall was scary.” her expression softened as she managed to look at her again, trying to understand a difficult situation. “Is...is that how you did it? When you worked for Justinia? Like a coping mechanism? Put up a shield, boom, you’re not you any more, and you can do anything?” She winced at her own words yet again as she realise she’d basically just attacked Leliana for protecting herself. “Maker, I’ve messed this one up haven’t I? Sorry. I just...don’t know how to help. Or even if you want me to...I should really stop prying. I’ll shut up now.”  
  
Leliana sighed, uncrossing her arms and leaving them to hang by her sides. She really did appreciate the girl’s concern. Needed it even. She’d been so closed off from other people ever since becoming the Left Hand and doing all the things she did. She’d learned to rely on nobody but herself. She desperately wanted to reach out to somebody, but had forgotten how to do so. Now a young woman, a close friend even, was reaching out to _her_ , and she’d shut her down completely.

“No, it’s ok,” the Bard sighed eventually, rubbing her temples, “I’m glad you were there to stop me. But yes, I suppose that is how I coped. I never thought much about it really, the technicalities, or the implications. I suppose I just wanted out of my own head,” she stopped, and then looked at the still faint mark on Estelle’s throat, “And I almost killed you because of it. Maker. I’m the one who should apologise.”  
“Let’s just agree we both made a hash of things. I forgive you, if you forgive me.”  
“That seems fair,” agreed Leliana with the faintest hint of a smile. She could see Estelle wanted to say something, but was containing herself this time, “It’s ok. Go ahead.”  
“I was just wondering...after everything you had to do, don’t worry, I won’t ask what...but...how did you get back to being _you_ you?”

Leliana realised, that had been a lot of her problem before. Every time she went into that frame of mind, it was harder and harder to come back from it. She wondered if she had ever really come back completely. She wasn’t convinced she had. Then she remembered Valence once more. The image always stuck in her mind, Estelle staying her hand at Natalie’s throat. Saving her, and Leliana too. Once upon a time, only her Warden could have done that, but the longer she spent away from her, the more lost she had become.

“I don’t think I was myself. Kaida used to bring me out of it,” it was the first time Leliana had told Estelle her lover’s name, “Whenever I got caught in the past or present. But then I had to go away, and then she did. So I was, alone.”  
“But you came back today, right?” Estelle hated to bring up things that hurt her friend, “That’s good, isn’t it?”  
“I haven’t been in that deep for a long time. I’m not sure I could have found myself again…” she looked at Estelle, realisation hitting her, “But...you did. Today, you were what brought me back. You stopped me falling in to my old ways, by finding another...thank you.”  
Estelle reached out and put an arm around the woman’s shoulders, pulling her close, and this time she didn’t pull away, “I’m so sorry Leliana. The whole thing sounds horrible. You said it yourself though, I’m here to watch your back. If you ever need snapping out of it again, you can wave as many daggers at me as you want.”

Leliana nodded as Estelle’s arm dropped. She knew the woman meant every word. She wished dearly she could get a notice to Kaida again. She knew she would be worried, but if she knew that she was ok, that she had good friends by her side, maybe it would stop her worrying, and help her come home faster. She put those melancholy thoughts out of her mind, as they were finally joined by a slightly flustered Cassandra.

“I’m sorry to have kept you. There was an issue…” She paused, realising she had interrupted something from the expressions on her advisor’s faces, but not knowing what.  
“We understand completely,” reassured Estelle immediately, and Leliana marvelled at how quickly she was bright and cheerful again. Perhaps she could learn a trick or two from her.  
“Would you care to join me for breakfast? I can’t imagine the pair of you have eaten either.”

They realised that they hadn’t. They’d been running on pure adrenalin and nervous energy. But my didn’t they feel it now. Cassandra summoned a servant, and it turned out to be the same young man as before. He greeted them with a bright smile, more than happy to serve a master that actually cared about the people under her. Before long, the three of them were seated at a table in the corner, having been served a wonderfully warm breakfast, with fresh meat and eggs. The young servant had told the kitchen staff about his treatment the night before, and it made them want to put in extra effort.

“Not a wonderful topic of conversation over a meal, I know,” began Cassandra, “But I don’t suppose you managed to find out who wants me dead? I mean, specifically.” she pulled a face, that didn’t really narrow it down, “From last night.”  
Estelle had a mouthful of egg, so Leliana answered the question, “A group calling themselves The True Believers.”  
“Oh, wonderful. Yet another cult?”  
“More or less. They want to tear down all figures of authority, in the misguided belief that every person in Thedas would govern themselves equally if left to it. Which, as previous experience has told us, never actually works.”  
“That sounds eerily like The Fiery Promise. How did a cult like that even manage to get into The Grand Cathedral?”  
Estelle swallowed, “I’m afraid they had help,” she passed over the letter she had received from Payton.  
Cassandra almost spat out her food, “The Grand Cleric? A Grand Cleric worked with these...insane zealots! She dared try and have me assassinated?!”  
“Presumably, she would have taken the reins herself, denied all links to The Believers, and then have them all extinguished,” Estelle shrugged.  
“That’s almost exactly what happened with Divine Beatrix,” realised Leliana.   
“Fewer dragons, but essentially the same,” agreed Cassandra.  
“Maybe that’s what inspired her,” pointed out Estelle, “She might have deliberately made it personal to you.”

It was a disturbing thought, but not a ridiculous one. Everyone in Orlais knew about the young Seeker that saved the Divine, and now she was sat in her place. It would have been an excellent story for fear mongering had they succeeded. The Hero of Orlais, struck down in the very place that had earned her that title. Cassandra was already mighty tired of politics, and she had only been acting in an official capacity for a day. Estelle tried to make her feel better about it, pointing out that she was only under so much threat, because people were scared of her, and the fact she could and would change things. If it had been a weaker candidate, they wouldn’t have bothered. It worked to a degree, and they started planning how to arrest The Grand Cleric, without her having the chance to contact more Believers, or harm their witnesses.

A ways away from the less cheerful of discussions, Josephine was quite enjoying her guided tour by the young Merryn. She was a slight girl of about fourteen with bright red hair and a very cheerful disposition. She reminded Josephine a little of Yvette, but more level headed. She had initially been very shy and formal, but as soon as Josephine had showed her how to braid her hair, she had been nothing but excitable and warm. Josie had that effect on people. She even snuck Josephine through the places only servants were meant to go, to introduce her to the others, and to share little secrets. She was partly showing off, very proud to have been given a special assignment by the Right Hand, but her friends didn’t resent her for it. She shared everything she gained with them. A group of half a dozen of the younger servants, who had been granted a break, gathered in a quiet corner in the gardens. Every one had sat on the floor to allow Josephine the only chair. They were bright, curious bunch, ranging in age from twelve to eighteen, and still good friends. They had so many questions, but Josephine was quite used to such circumstances.

“Lady Montilyet?” ventured the youngest, a shy elf girl with white-blonde hair,  
“Yes Claudette?”  
“Is it true...that Lady Trevelyan was attacked by ten dragons...and beat them all?”  
“Actually, yes, that one is true,” Josephine had no idea how she had managed it, but she did.  
“That’s awesome!” exclaimed an older boy, the black-eyed Alvise, immediately jumping up and making slashing motions with his hand and a stick, “I want to  be a dragon slayer!”  
“Isn’t that what The Divine’s family used to do?” piped up the oldest girl, Berenice, with long brown hair she was letting Claudette braid. “Pentaghast, right?” she looked at Josephine, suddenly on edge, “Am I allowed to say that?”  
“I don’t imagine it would cause offense. As long as you address people properly when required.”  
“So what can we call them?” questioned the oldest boy, a quiet fellow, another elf, in fact, he was the one who had cleaned up the glasses and served the others breakfast, Esmail. “I always try to avoid saying names, so I don’t sound rude. In fact, I just try and avoid talking,” he blushed and looked down.  
“A good question, young man." responded Josephine, slipping into Ambassador mode. "The Divine, can be addressed as Most Holy or Your Holiness, never by her first or family name.” She also left out the alternative of 'Your Perfection' because she knew Cassandra would hate that.  
“And the Hands?” pressed Berenice.   
“Either of them can be called My Lady. If you prefer, the Left is Sister Nightingale to people who don’t know her very well, or Sister Leliana, if she allows it. The Right can be addressed as Lady Trevelyan, or, if _she_ allows, Lady Estelle.”  
“And yourself, my lady?” added Esmail.  
Josephine smiled, “In a situation like this, you can call me Josephine. If we were in polite company or around The Divine, I’m afraid it would have to be Lady Montilyet. If it happens to be just myself and the Hands, Lady Josephine will suffice.”  
“You don’t seem much like a Lady,” piped up Claudette, and then immediately blushed scarlet and covered her mouth with her hands when she realised what she had said, “Oh, Maker! I mean...you’re nice. You don’t act all...like you look down on us…I’m so sorry Lady Montilyet.”  
Josephine chuckled, “That’s quite alright. You’ll find in time that there are some of us out there who are nice, unfortunately not all, but that’s hardly your fault.”  
“Lady Trevelyan is one of them.” Merryn agreed, “She speaks very kindly to everyone, and when one of the others tried to trip me, she scolded him something fierce.”  
Esmail nodded, “The Divine helped me clean up some broken glass herself.”

Josephine smiled to hear her friends praised so without prompting, and appreciated the awed murmurs and nods at the two little stories. They were doing very well for themselves already. They had certainly inspired loyalty in these youngsters, and it was them who would grow up in their service. She fielded several more questions, before Merryn dismissed them both to go and find some refreshment, and if she was lucky, a certain Lady Trevelyan.


	8. Eight

As luck would have it, it wasn’t long before Josephine and Merryn stumbled upon The Divine’s advisors. They were in a large back courtyard away from the main building, set up as a training ground for the soldiers, far away from the civilisation the rest of The Cathedral required. Estelle was smart enough to know Leliana was still wound up about what had happened earlier, and had suggested hitting and slashing a few things might help. They were sparring in their matching armour, and completely oblivious to everyone except their opponent. It was an awesome sight. As Josephine and Merryn entered, they were greeted by a clash of metal on metal as each Hand darted at the other. Their armor glinted, and the way they spun and dodged reminded the onlookers of some intricate waltz. A sweep by Estelle would be neatly jumped over by Leliana, and a lunge by Leliana would be neatly turned aside by Estelle. They circled one another, coming in to close quarters, daggers pressing against daggers, before both pushing away. They ducked and weaved and twirled like ballerinas, graceful and powerful.

“No wonder they’re the bodyguards,” whispered an awestruck Merryn to Josephine.  
“You should see them when they fight side by side,” whispered Josephine back.

Her words caught the attention of the duellers, and they both turned to see who had arrived, then smiled and returned to their normal positions, sweating and breathing heavily. Estelle was a little pleased to see the expression on Merryn’s face, and even more pleased when it was mirrored by Josephine.

“I was wondering where you two had gotten to,” Estelle smiled and walked over, “Did you enjoy your tour?”  
Josephine, “Very much so. Young Merryn here is an excellent host,” Merryn blushed as red as her hair, “How was your morning?”  
Estelle glanced at Leliana, then back to Josephine, “Eventful, to say the least.”

She wasn’t about to go into the details around Merryn. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust the girl, but more that she didn’t want to burden her. She also wasn’t going to tell Josephine more about Leliana’s troubles than the woman herself wanted to. Instead, she wanted to take the opportunity to entertain the young girl, who still had no idea of The Divine’s plans for her, being apprenticed to the Hands would not be an easy job, as a way of thanking her for looking after Josephine.

“Do you want to see something incredible, Merryn?”

Merryn was still embarrassed to be addressed directly, but nodded. Estelle nodded towards Leliana, who smiled, and grabbed her bow and quiver, grateful for the distraction. Estelle summoned two of her men as they passed, and got them to fiddle with some mechanisms that stood quite a way away from the group, with two rows of targets on them. Josephine and Merryn had no idea what was happening, and neither did Estelle’s men, to be fair, but they followed her without question. Estelle whispered something in Leliana’s ear, and the woman nodded.

“Lady Montilyet, may I borrow your scarf?”

Curious, Josephine handed over the dark blue material, and watched as Estelle proceeded to use it as a blindfold for Leliana. Even the soldiers looked a little worried, acutely aware they were in the line of fire.

Estelle turned to Leliana, “Ready?” the woman nodded, “Go!”

The two soldiers turned levers, and the row of targets started scrolling, in opposite directions, Leliana raised her bow, and waited for her friend’s signal.

“Left.”

Leliana responded instantly, and her arrow flew, embedding itself directly in the centre of the furthest left target at the top. Merryn clapped her hands over her mouth, and even Josephine gasped. It was a simple process, but highly skilled. Leliana had to trust Estelle’s guidance implicitly, and Estelle had to know exactly how her friend fought. Target after target swung, arrows striking their middles. Nobody watching could believe it when the targets stopped. All of them had been hit. But Estelle knew her friend’s skill, and was proud of it. She took off Leliana’s blindfold, instructing her men to gather up the arrows for her, and Merryn and Josephine started clapping.

“Wow,” breathed Merryn.  
“Told you you should see them working together,” Josephine didn’t bother to hide her own pride.  
“I did nothing,” chuckled Estelle, “That’s all Sister Nightingale.”

Leliana caught Merryn craning her neck, trying to get a closer look at her bow. She held it out to her, and the girl jumped as she realised she’d been spotted. Never the less, she very gently took the offered weapon, and was surprised by the weight of it, and the fact it was actually taller than her. Estelle quickly steadied it for her so she could inspect it.

“It’s really beautiful,” complimented Merryn,  
“Thank you,” responded Leliana graciously, “It was a present from…” she paused, “A friend.” Meaning Kaida. But Merryn didn’t need to know that.

Leliana took the arrows that the soldiers had retrieved, and dismissed them with a nod. The little party took their leave of the training grounds. Merryn was immensely pleased to be in the company of three such impressive figures. When she had come to The Grand Cathedral she didn’t expect anything other than a job and enough food to keep going. To be able to interact with these remarkable women, and to actually have them seeming to enjoy her company felt like a dream. She would have to tell her mother all about it next time she wrote. After a while, she was called away to another duty, and was saddened to go, but she was nothing if not obedient, and did so.

“I think you have a little admirer Josephine,” Estelle teased gently.  
“Me? You should hear what she says about you. The other young ones too. They absolutely adore you all. I don’t think any of them have ever been treated so well.”

Leliana remained quiet through the discussion, and Josephine could tell something was wrong, but she daren’t ask. She also noticed that Estelle would regard their friend more often as well, as if watching for something. Clearly she was worried too. Perhaps she could get more out of her when they were alone, but she knew Estelle was very loyal, and unlikely to disclose any of Leliana’s personal problems. After a little while, she excused herself from their company, and neither of them protested. They knew when she needed space, and that she would come to back to them when she wanted to.

“So, do you know what’s wrong with Leliana?” queried Josephine as they walked arm in arm towards the gardens.  
“I think she’s just thinking about the assassination, and it’s implications,” responded Estelle, that was bound to be part of it. “She likes to consider every angle.”  
“What are the implications? Or can’t you tell me?”  
“I can tell you, but tonight, when we’re alone, ok? You never know who might be listening.”

They spent the rest of the day in each other’s company. Dealing with Lewin and the others, and coming up with a plan of action with Cassandra had taken up most of the morning and afternoon, so she was grateful when she had been told to spend some time with Josephine. They sat in the gardens, drinking tea and generally catching up, as well as lightly touching on some ideas for their wedding. Estelle’s heart fluttered every time she thought about marrying her beautiful Josie, her eyes lit up and enthusiasm filled her voice when they spoke about even the smallest things.

“Do I need to go to Antiva to ask your parent’s permission?” Estelle suddenly thought,  
Josephine chuckled, “No, I don’t think so. I’m fairly certain they were expecting it. It would be good if you could take some time off and come and visit everyone though. I apologise in advance on behalf of Yvette.”  
“Ah, Yvette. How did her gallery opening go?”  
“Surprisingly well,” responded Josephine, “She is actually quite talented when she puts her mind to it. Does take rather a lot of coaxing to get her to sit down and concentrate on finishing though. What about Lorelai? How’s she doing?”  
Estelle sighed, “My brother keeps setting her up with eligible bachelors. She hates it. Unfortunately my parents can do very little, as Kendrick is technically the head of the family now.”  
“Surely they can tell him not to force his own sister into something she doesn’t want?”  
“You’d think. He’s so concerned with the family reputation, he seems to forget family are more than a name. I feel rather bad I’ve left her own her own with him, truth be told. I’m working on it though.”  
“Oh? How so?”  
“Lorelai is a fantastic seamstress. I’m wondering if we might not find her a job here, helping with robes for the Chantry folk, and perhaps Cassandra. She’s very intuitive, so she’d know how to avoid winding her up. She’d be delighted to earn her own way too. We both hated being doted on when we were younger.”  
“That sounds like an excellent plan.”  
“You must come to Ostwick!” Estelle said suddenly, “I think Cassandra plans to visit Nevarra, then the Marches, then Antiva, to show good will or some such.”  
“She’s going to Nevarra? I thought she hated the place.”  
“She does, but she has to keep up appearances. I think the idea was that getting that bit over and done first and then moving towards places more desirable. The Trevelyans have always had a good relationship with the Chantry, and a number of them died at the Conclave, so I think it’s a respect thing.”

Josephine hadn’t thought about Estelle losing family at the Temple of Sacred Ashes before, and it was a rude awakening. Estelle however didn’t seem to be quite as phased. She had come to terms with it, and at least none of her immediate family had been there. They turned to other topics of conversation, amusement and affection that let them to the setting sun. Finally deciding it was an appropriate time to retire, the couple headed back to Estelle’s quarters. They were presented with a quiet dinner by Esmail, who beamed as he saw Josephine, and deliberately used the proper terms of address for Estelle. Josephine discreetly nodded encouragement as he did so, and he left feeling decidedly less nervous than before.

For a little while they were joined by Cassandra, who had come mainly to talk to Josephine, as they hadn’t had as much time to catch up. They stayed up chatting and reminiscing until late, and when Cassandra left, the couple all but collapsed into bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote the start of the chapter as a bit of a light break, so it's kind of silly fun to offset at least some of the angst. I find angst pretty heavy going to write, apologies if you think it grates.


	9. Nine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible trigger? PTSD. I'm not sure, sorry :S.

Estelle had no idea what time it was when she woke. All she was aware of was the fact that it was completely dark, except the moon shining brightly through the windows, and there was some kind of noise. She couldn’t quite put her finger on what it was. Initially she thought it was Josephine, but she turned to look and realised she had just been disturbed too. She looked blearily at Estelle, who looked just as blearily back. She heard a muffled shout that slightly alarmed her, and then a crash and the noise of shattering glass. The pair jumped to the same conclusion,

“Leliana!” they chorused.

They both quickly but clumsily got out of bed, pulling on enough clothing to at least cover themselves, and Estelle grabbed the daggers she kept under her night stand, making a beeline for the connecting door. She instructed Josephine to stay behind her, and with a quick flick of the wrist, she opened it and fell back into a defensive stance right away, but no assailant came at her. Frowning, she looked at Josephine, and then peered into the dim light of her friend’s room. The only person there was Leliana. But she was twisting and turning and occasionally crying out. The tumbler of water beside her bed had smashed onto the floor, clearly she had lashed out and knocked it. Carefully avoiding the broken glass, Estelle went to her side, with Josephine close by.

“What’s wrong with her?!” whispered a panicked Josephine,  
“Night terrors? Flashbacks? I don’t know precisely.” sighed Estelle, “I was worried this might happen.” She put down her weapons and knelt on the edge of the bed, as Josephine brushed the broken glass away. Estelle gently tapped her shoulder, trying to stir the woman, “Leliana? Leliana?” she called quietly, “Can you hear me Leliana?”

Leliana seemed to wake as she shot upwards, but her eyes had that same glazed, distant look as before, and she was rigid and trembling. Estelle could actually see how quickly her heart was beating in her chest, and ever so softly took her hand, trying to bring her out of it again. But the bard was oblivious, all she could hear was screaming in her ears, getting louder and louder. She withdrew her hand from Estelle and covered her ears, closing her eyes tightly, trying to stop the cacophony as it set her teeth on edge and panicked her beyond belief. The crying and the wailing were torture, at her eyes played tricks on her, blood dripping down the walls, Josephine's throat had a gaping hole. She was convinced knives were cutting in to her skin all over again, and she was frozen to the spot. 

“Leliana,” repeated the woman, more firmly this time, “Come back.” She deliberately raised her voice, trying to bring her friend back into the moment. "Look, look around you. You're in your room, in Val Royeaux. With Josie, and me."

The words finally seemed to reach her, and she turned to face Estelle, who motioned to Josephine to grab a small bottle from the woman’s dressing table. She was still shaking, and Estelle realised she must have been in shock. She opened her arms in offering, knowing better than to embrace the woman without permission, in case she felt trapped again. Leliana leaned her weight on the younger woman, partly because she was unable to support it herself, and consented to Estelle wrapping her arms around her. Josephine handed her a small glass full of whatever was in the bottle. It was incredibly potent, and the smell alone made her wrinkle her nose. But that was the point. Gently, Estelle placed it in Leliana’s hand and replaced the empty container on the side. The bard suddenly wrapped her arms around her young friend, completely forgetting her usual cool and closed off demeanor, clinging on for dear life, and Josephine sat the other side of her, rubbing her back comfortingly.

“Leli?” Josephine said quietly, “Do you want to talk?”

Leliana shook her head. It couldn’t have been anything other than her past. Either she had been tortured, or was torturing, in her nightmares. Both women knew both had happened in the Bard’s life. Leliana felt utterly helpless and ridiculous, and angry at herself, relying on women years younger than her to allay her fears, but she had nobody else, and couldn’t let Estelle go, even if she wanted to. The kiss planted on her forehead and the smoothing of her hair reminded her of her mother, and her fingers gripped Estelle’s shirt even harder.

“I killed you this time.” She offered by way of explanation, but her voice was barely audible.

The Trevelyan’s eyes widened, now she had no chance of disentangling from her dream-assassin’s embrace. Not after that morning. The three sat there for some time in silence, the pair on either end protectively supporting the one in the middle. Eventually, Leliana was coaxed into trying to sleep again as Josephine and Estelle promised to stay nearby. She knew it was a childish, and she wouldn’t be able to meet their eyes in the morning, but for now she just didn’t want to be alone any more.

The bed wasn’t really big enough for three people, so they curled up together, partly for extra warmth, and partly to avoid falling off. Leliana was sandwiched in the middle, being held protectively by the other two, and it was the only way she managed to drift off again, into a mercifully dreamless sleep. Her guardians took much longer to relax, their expressions talking to each other in a way only those who were intimate could, mostly about their mutual fear for their charge, but they too eventually managed to sleep.

Leliana was the first to wake, and found herself still being hugged from either side, with her two young friend’s hands intertwined over her. They hadn’t left her all night, and she was grateful for their support, if still embarrassed. The three of them lay there for a while, staring at the ceiling and lost in her own thoughts, but still keeping close to one another. They didn’t have quite such a rush that morning, and it was nice to just relax for a while. Leliana had not felt as safe since the last time she had been with Kaida.

“I…” Leliana faltered, “Don’t know what to say…”  
“It’s ok, you don’t need to say anything,” Estelle smiled.  
“Are you feeling better?” ventured Josephine.  
Leliana nodded, “Yes...well. A little,” her dreams were still haunting her, but the light of day and the presence of friends was easing it. “How did you know to get that bottle?”  
“Same as ever,” Estelle smiled, “Listening.”

She didn’t mention the few times Cole had come to her in Skyhold, concerned about Leliana’s well being and wine consumption. It had eventually lead her to discreetly acquire the tonic, and getting Cole to use his abilities to teach Leliana to take it, with no memory of either of them having been involved. Neither did Josephine mention the secret being disclosed one night because Estelle felt so guilty for sneaking around like that.

“You do that a lot,” Leliana smiled tiredly back. “Sorry I bothered the pair of you. I know you don’t see each other much.”  
“Nonsense,” responded Josephine, with a look of approval from Estelle, “It was no bother at all. When are you going to learn friends support friends, regardless of situation or circumstance?”  
“I’m trying,” Leliana sighed.

Reluctantly, the three of them realised they had best get a move on. There was the hearing today, and it was Josephine’s last day in Val Royeaux. Neither she nor Estelle wanted to dwell on it as they got ready back in their own room, and hid their aching hearts behind smiles, cheerful banter, and planning for her to meet them when they got to Ostwick. They were quieter however, hugging and kissing each other more, clasping fingers and helping one another do their hair and clothing, with intense detail. They met Leliana outside and all headed towards the throne room in silence. They had to be there early to talk strategy with Cassandra, and they knew she wouldn’t object to Josephine sitting in. She was a skilled diplomat after all, well versed in politics. It was quite a sight to walk into the throne room, and see a close friend sitting in the place of honour. Cassandra was in full Divine gear, but the way she sat, and the way she leaned her head on her hand were obvious signs that she hadn’t slept well either. Josephine gave Estelle a peck on the cheek before sitting at the side, next to the Speaker, who greeted her with a smile, even though his face was grave.

“Your Holiness,” greeted Estelle and Leliana in unison, with a bow.

Cassandra couldn’t help but make a disgruntled noise under her breath as she nodded, she hated her friends having to be seen ‘serving’ her, but she knew it was protocol. She had missed their company yesterday, having grown so used to having them around all the time. The Hands took up their positions either side of the woman. Estelle crouched down and gently leaned on Cassandra’s knee, the people here knew they were good friends, so would think nothing of it.

“How are you doing?” she asked in a low voice. To anyone that might come in, it simply looked like they were discussing business.  
“Terrible,” came the honest answer, “I barely slept so my brain is scrambled, and now I have to decide the fate of a Grand Cleric feeling like a ghoul.”  
Estelle tilted her head, looking up with concern, “Anything I can do? Have you eaten? I can get Esmail to fetch my mead.”  
“Just being here is a good start,” replied Cassandra with a sigh, “And that would be wonderful, if you could. I always got tense during judgement at Skyhold, and it wasn’t even me in the hotseat. What if I do something wrong?”  
Estelle called over a servant to contact Esmail, and she disappeared as the woman turned back to her friend. “Best thing to do is to remember to breathe. Take as much time as you need to think, and Leliana and I can always offer suggestions if you need them. It is our job as advisors.”

Cassandra nodded, and Estelle patted her knee reassuringly before straightening up. They were all nervous, but this was the first trial of many to come. If they managed to come out of this one well, they had little to fear from the others. It was the waiting that was unbearable. Thankfully, Esmail appeared with the signature Trevelyan drink, and it was delightedly received. He presented it on a tray with a bow, and the three women took the offering.

Cassandra gave a tired nod, “Thank you, Esmail.”  
His poise almost faltered, he couldn’t believe The Divine knew his name, “It was my honour, Your Holiness.”  
They all quickly downed their beverages, and replaced the empty glasses on the tray once more, “You may go.”

He did so, still slightly buzzing from the fact he had been singled out and directly addressed by Most Holy, the others wouldn’t believe it. Cassandra, despite feeling warmed now, still couldn’t believe any of this was happening. The clock struck and she froze for a split second, before Leliana gave her an encouraging nod that made her remember to exhale. Moments later, the Throne Room doors swung open, and the Grand Cleric was escorted in by two guards. One of them being Wystan. The poor boy still hadn’t escaped the mess. The Cleric was a tall, proud woman. Her eyes were cold silver, and her hair ash blonde. She did not look particularly appreciative of being summoned to the Throne Room first thing in the morning, but whether it was anger, nerves, or a mixture of both, was not entirely clear.

“Your Holiness,” she greeted, through gritted teeth with a stiff bow, “I congratulate you on your ordination...but this call was highly irregular.”  
“I apologise, Lady Chantal. But there is a particularly urgent matter I needed to discuss with you,” responded Cassandra, all manners and a surprising amount of grace.  
“And it warranted an armed escort?” her voice was incredulous.  
“Watch your tone around Her Holiness,” scolded Leliana sharply.   
Chantal was momentarily subdued, “I beg your pardon, Your Holiness. I awoke early and unexpectedly.”  
“A lot of that going around, it would seem.” There was an edge of something in The Divine’s voice, but Chantal couldn’t quite pinpoint what.  
“May I ask what this is about?”  
Cassandra motioned to the Speaker, who stood up, “Speaker. Perhaps you can fill Lady Chantal in?”  
“Of course your Holiness.”

Now Chantal was getting nervous. She hadn’t noticed the Speaker before now, and she was suddenly acutely aware of the narrowed eyes focused on her, coming from the direction of Sister Nightingale and Lady Trevelyan, who was already discreetly flexing her fingers as they hovered over the knife hilts on her thighs. The Speaker cleared his throat.  
  
“Sister Delilah Chantal. You stand before us, accused of the highest treason, the attempted assassination of Divine Victoria the First, in collaboration with The True Believers, who you led into these most hallowed grounds and who are also responsible for the deaths of three innocent civilians. How do you plead?”

“What?!” Chantal’s voice became a high-pitched screech, “I would do no such thing! How dare you accuse me so! It’s outrageous. I’m leaving.”

She turned on her heel to go, and was stopped by Wystan and his partner standing firmly between her and the door. There was the sound of metal being sharpened against metal, as Estelle retrieved her weapons and held them ready to throw or slice.

“Sister Chantal. Kindly remember where you are, and who are you speaking to, unless you care to become better acquainted with Lady Trevelyan here, I do believe she finds a moving target quite enjoyable,” threatened Cassandra in a low, dangerous voice. “Sister Nightingale, in your expert opinion, would you say the lady doth protest too much?”  
“I believe she does, Your Holiness.”  
“Master Speaker,” Cassandra turned to the gentlemen, “Please proceed.”  
“I have here a letter,” he turned to The Divine, “Would you care for me to read it out?”

Cassandra nodded, and the Speaker continued.

_Dear Eskine,_

_The Coronation should be taking place at 5.30pm tonight, so by my calculation it would be about 6.30pm that the Pretender will be on the grand balcony. I have enclosed maps of the areas less commonly surveyed in the Cathedral, and the official contract of business._

_She has guards, but one is young and inexperienced, and the other is more interested in birds than combat. I sincerely doubt they will provide any hindrance to you, or that they will suspect such an early blow, but what’s that saying ‘nip it in the bud?’._

_The Pretender has no right to be where she is, and I will be glad to see her gone. I wish you luck, and we will reconvene after your mission is complete._

_Yours faithfully,_

_Lady Delilah Chantal._

“Lady Chantal. Is this not your signature?” pressed the Speaker.  
“Where did you?!” her face was pale and her voice barely audible.  
“Ah, that would be courtesy of my ‘young and inexperienced’ advisor.” Offered Cassandra by way of explanation. “Your accusations were most impolite. She may be young, but I would bet my crown that she is far more capable and experienced than yourself, Lady Chantal. After all. She, and Sister Nightingale here, who has many more interests than you claim, are the ones that caught you. I take it you didn’t realise just who you were dealing with.”  
"The name Trevelyan doesn't ring a bell?" Leliana's voice was cold in it's amusement.

Chantal's face suddenly looked grim as the facts sunk in. The Inquisitor. She had known it was a Trevelyan, and a woman, but there were so many Trevelyans around, and she had never met her personally. If she had known she was up against the woman and her team,  who fixed a hole in the sky, ended civil war, and prevented the destruction of the whole of Thedas, perhaps she would not have taken her chances. She also instantly regretted thinking that Leliana was past her prime after the death of Justinia.

“I’m not the only one!” cried Chantal, “There will be others! You have no place here, dragon hunter.”  
“And yet your fate is in my hands.”   
“So it would seem. And what will you do with that power? Hm?”

It was at that point that Cassandra turned to her advisors for help. There were a lot of options, imprisonment, banishment, menial labour, public humiliation, and, of course, execution. She was nervous about that last option. Especially when she saw Estelle and Leliana looking at each other, apparently having come to the same conclusion.

“We have to end this now, Your Holiness,” said Leliana, matter of fact, “If you establish your power at the very start, you don’t have to worry about it later on. It would give your more scope, so perhaps you may not need to do it again.  
“I hate to say it, but Sister Leliana is right,” agreed Estelle, “I only ever once sanctioned an official execution, and that was Erimond. I believe Lady Chantal is cut from similar cloth. If you’re severe now, you have the option to be less severe later, should you choose to be. You’ll have more freedom to rule how you want if people know they can’t cross you.”

Cassandra sighed. They were right. She hadn’t wanted her first official act to be execution, but she couldn’t afford to show weakness. Even Estelle had done it when it was necessary, and she was the most forgiving, noble hearted person she had come across.

“Lady Delilah Chantal. I cannot let this go. You will be executed at sunrise tomorrow. May the Maker have mercy on your soul. Guards. Take her to the cells.”

Chantal, yelling and shouting to the very end, was swiftly escorted out of the room by the guards, and everyone left, Cassandra, Estelle, Leliana, Josephine and even the Speaker let out a sigh of relief. He knew it was difficult for The Divine to have to do something like that, but he agreed with her actions, and was glad she had supportive allies.

“Master Speaker?” Cassandra looked at him.  
“Yes, Your Holiness?”  
“May I ask a favour?”  
“Of course, I am at your service,” he bowed.  
“Please can you approach Mother Giselle, and let her know I have a position she may be interested in.”  
  
The Speaker looked delighted, and the others from the Inquisition did too. He hurried away, eager to be able to pass on good news for a change. Cassandra, finally released from duty, stood up. She turned to her three friends, as Josephine had already rejoined the group, and was very glad they were there.

“Walk with me. I need to get out of here for a while. I’ve been stuck in this building non stop for far too long.”

 

 


	10. Ten

The four women made their way through the servants quarters, to avoid being spotted by people who would no doubt pile more work on top of them. It was a companionable silence they walked in, Cassandra and Leliana in front, and Josephine and Estelle with linked arms behind them.

“We could head out to the plaza?” suggested Estelle, “If we’re careful,” she peered down at the heraldry emblazoned on her chest, “And, discreet.”  
Leliana nodded, “I’m sure people won’t object, especially if we’re both with you.”  
“It sounds like a wonderful idea,” Josephine responded happily, “I would love to look around the merchants.”  
“That would be pleasant.” Cassandra agreed.  
“We should change into things less conspicuous, and meet by the gates,” decided Leliana. Stealth was her specialty after all.

The others agreed, and Cassandra, Leliana and Estelle were relieved to be back in their normal, less flashy armour. It felt rather like home, in a strange way. Skyhold had been large, but still seemed cosy and intimate. If you wanted to talk you could track down a friend. If you didn’t, they could find you. Each member of the Inquisition’s doors was open to all the others, and that was what they missed most. The Cathedral was all cold white stone, Cassandra was miles away from the other two, and Josephine was all the way over in Antiva. There were mild protestations from some of the sterner Chantry Sisters, but the majority just let them get on with it.

Estelle couldn’t help but think of the first time she’d been to Val Royeaux, and condemned to her face by the Chantry there. Now she was strolling along side the Divine, cool as you like, and the whispers that she could hear were the very opposite of damnation. They remained relatively unnoticed, and those who did recognise Cassandra were soon quieted by a look from her that said she didn’t want to be bothered. She was immensely enjoying the fresh air and change of scenery, and even the talk about fashion and gossip that Josephine and Leliana were exchanging. The topic interested her little, but the companionship meant a great deal.

“Oh! There it is!” exclaimed Josephine suddenly, “Come on Leli!” she grabbed Leliana by the arm and dragged her towards a fabric shop, “You two get a drink or something, there’s something I need to sort out.” She doubled back to quickly kiss Estelle, and then continued pulling the unfortunate Spymaster away.  
  
Cassandra and Estelle looked at each other, then Cassandra shrugged and gesture to the little bistro in the courtyard they used to visit on stopover from Skyhold. Estelle nodded and the pair were shown to a seat at the back. The owner knew them of course, and was happy to oblige in keeping the attention off them. He brought over one of his best bottles of wine and two glasses. With a smile of thanks, the pair turned their attention to the musician in the corner and sat in respectful silence until she finished.

“Feeling better?” questioned Estelle as she poured her friend a drink.  
“Much. I think I’d go insane if I had to stay in there a moment longer.”  
“I think it’s just been a crazy few months all round,” agreed Estelle. “You know, I don’t remember the last time it was just you and me talking.”  
“Me either. I admit I have rather missed it.”  
Estelle nodded, “I missed you too. It feels like an age since we last spoke without being interrupted or discussing Chantry matters.”  
Cassandra smirked, “Or being waylaid by one of my breakdowns?”  
Estelle laughed, “That too.”  
“I do appreciate you being there for me though.”  
“Of course. It’s what I do.”

They sat in thoughtful quiet for a little while, each reflecting on the different aspects of their own introduction to the Grand Cathedral. They had gone through some very similar and very different trials throughout that time, but each one of them realised that though they hadn’t spoken as often, things had been made easier by the other just being there.

“For what it’s worth, I think you’ve handled yourself brilliantly. I’m so proud of you Cassandra,” Estelle beamed, “To think, the first time we met you were my prison guard. Now you’re my best friend, and I couldn’t be more thankful.”

Cassandra blushed slightly at the praise, but she was pleased beyond measure at Estelle’s words. Of all the people she knew, she was held in highest regard, about the only person who’s opinion Cassandra actually cared about. She’d never been particularly good with other people. Too brash and hot-headed, and never daring show her softer side. It was Estelle who had wheedled it out of her, and who had patiently put up with all her nonsense and stubbornness, the thick skin she’d covered herself in for protection. On Estelle’s part, she was still amazed Cassandra had chosen to open up to her and felt privileged to even have befriended the woman, let alone gotten so close to her. They were very different people, but that just served to make them value each other more.

“I wouldn’t be where I am without you.”  
“Ah, you probably would,” grinned Estelle, “But it wouldn’t have been half as fun.” She wrapped an arm around Cassandra and hugged her, clinking their glasses together, “Cheers, Cass.”  
“Cheers, Ellie.”

They sat gently tapping their feet and listening to the musician for a while, letting the hecticness of everything ease away a little. After a while they spotted Leliana, looking a little flustered, and waved her over. Estelle smirked, she knew what shopping with Josephine was like, and the expression on the Sister’s face caused Cassandra to push over a glass of wine, which she promptly downed in one.

“But Leliana, I thought you liked clothes and shopping.”  
“I think I’m too old to keep up with Josie these days.”  
“I’m younger than her and struggle,” Estelle smiled.   
“She’s not done with you yet,” warned Leliana, “She sent me to come and get you both.”  
“Oh dear. I know where this is going. Even so, best not keep her waiting, she’s fierce when things need doing.” Estelle grinned, it was one of the things she loved about her.

She stood up, paying their bill as she left, with Leliana and Cassandra in hot, if cautious, pursuit. The second she wandered through the doors she was immediately pounced on by three people with tape measures, two holding fabric samples, and one Josephine pushing her towards a stool.

“Uh...Josie?”   
  
As her eyes adjusted to the light, she noticed she was in a huge shop that took up the whole two floors. It was all white marble, as Orlesian building were prone to be, even if the doors were falling off, and there were shelves upon shelves of different fabrics, threads, motifs and clothes. Everywhere seemed to drip with wealth (and absurdity, in Cassandra’s opinion) and poor bemused Estelle had no idea what was going on. Her friends stood off to the side, shaking their heads in sympathy as Estelle was hoisted up onto the stool. Her cheeks went pink, she hated being the centre of attention.

“You have a new position now. You _really_ need to dress the part,” Josephine smiled, then whisked Estelle of the stool as people finished measuring her.  
“I already have new armour,” protested Estelle, though she knew she was fighting a losing battle.  
“Which has it’s place, and it’s not all the time, everywhere.”  
“Why not?”  
“Because that’s not how politics works.”  
  
Estelle sent a pleading looking towards Leliana and Cassandra, but they didn’t want to get involved. They also knew Josephine had a point. Impressions were essential, especially when you were building something back up from the ground. She sighed as Josephine pushed her behind a curtain, carrying something in her arms.

“Here, put this on,” she instructed.  
“But it’s!”  
“No arguing.”  
  
Leliana and Cassandra couldn’t help but look at each other with a hint of amusement on their faces. They felt sorry for the poor girl, but it would prepare her for future married life. They winced as they heard more protestations, and shrunk back in response.

“I can’t wear this! It’s...exposing!” cried the girl, causing the other two to look slightly alarmed.  
“That’s because it isn’t tied right. Come here.” There was a moment’s silence, before Josephine clapped with delight, “Perfect! I knew it. That’s definitely your colour. You simply have to show the others.”

_“Why?_ I feel silly enough as it is. I don’t need them laughing at me too.”  
“They won’t,” promised Josephine.

Moments later, with a good yank of the hand, Josephine pulled Estelle, who by now was more scarlet than pink, from behind the curtain. She crossed her arms over her chest, until Josephine pulled them away, and both Leliana and Cassandra’s mouths dropped open. They had never seen her outside her armour, or her woolen shirt and trousers. Now she was stood in front of them, in a dress. They had been half convinced she had no idea what one even was. It was a beautiful deep purple colour, with a low cut neck, that ended as gold strings criss-crossed down her front from her chest to her waist. They were astounded, it was more than they’d ever seen of their friend. Cassandra found herself surprisingly embarrassed, she’d never really thought about the fact that Estelle was indeed female, though at least Leliana could appreciate ‘good work’ when she saw it. The dress was asymmetrical, going from just below her right knee down to the floor on the left, and the sleeves were long and flowing. Both the hem and sleeves had intricate gold detailing to match the corset-like ties, which they could appreciate very well, as Estelle was now hiding her face behind them.

“Beautiful Mademoiselle!” exclaimed one of the tailors, and the others joined in with agreement.    
“I feel ridiculous,” grumbled Estelle.  
“But you _do_ look beautiful,” pointed out Leliana.  
“See! I told you!” Josephine shot her fianceé a triumphant look.  
Owing to a jar in the ribs from Leliana, Cassandra cleared her throat, “Um, yes. Very...dressy?”

Estelle actually found herself slightly snorting at Cassandra’s comment, giggling nervously. Josephine pulled the woman towards her, crossing her arms over the woman’s hips, and kissed her.

“You are absolutely stunning, Rosaline,” she smiled.  
“You’re lucky I love you. I’d never be caught dead in this otherwise.”  
“I know. There’s others I’d like to see you in.”  
  
The ‘before I go’ was the unspoken ending to the sentence, and Estelle’s heart sank, she pulled Josephine close and held her there for a while. The tailors weren’t quite sure what was going on, but Cassandra and Leliana did, and they felt for the pair. Leliana took the chance to distract the tailors by asking about a design at the back of the shop, and Cassandra went with her and them to look. Estelle took Josephine’s hand and went back behind the curtain. As she did so, Josephine buried her head in her chest, trying to stop herself from crying, but it didn’t work. Estelle felt like sobbing herself, but both of them couldn’t break down at the same time, so instead she hugged her tightly, resting her chin on her head.

“Sorry,” sniffed Josephine, “I’m being so silly. It’s not like we won’t see each other soon.”  
“It’s not silly. I’ll miss you too,” she leaned down slightly and tilted Josephine’s chin up to kiss her, “But we’ll need to write all the time. We have a wedding to plan.”  
  
Josephine giggled, glad Estelle was always able to know exactly what to say. Estelle wiped away her tears with a thumb and Josephine rested her hand on the woman’s cheek. She couldn’t get over just how stunning she looked, and she appreciated it even more knowing that Estelle was doing it to humour her.

“Now. You wanted to show me some other things, yes?” The Trevelyan was resigned to her fate, “Then dress me, oh mistress of fashion.”

Between them they managed to make it look like Josephine hadn’t just been crying, and Estelle changed her attitude completely just to make her smile. Every outfit she tried on, she struck silly (and sometimes surprisingly sultry) poses, and twirled so everyone could see all the work that went into the clothes. The tailors seemed over the moon to have such a responsive model and it entertained her friends no end to see another side of her. As they were leaving, all loaded up with purchases, the owner of the shop smiled at Estelle.  
  
“Should you ever need new employment mademoiselle, I’m sure the Orlesian runway would fall at your feet.”

Estelle blushed at the comment and thanked him, before quickly exiting. She could certainly put on a show, but it was at this point she was getting worn out of being around so many people. She was glad it was just her partner and friends with her now, although each step back towards The Cathedral seemed heavier and heavier. The couple entwined their fingers, clutching hands tightly all the way back to the base of operations. 


	11. Eleven

When they arrived, they were daunted by the escort that was to take Josephine home. Cassandra and Leliana promptly left them to it. It was not a cheerful scene as Estelle helped Josephine with her bags. All was done in stony silence, both of them fearing they might crack if they spoke. Eventually, inevitably, came the goodbye moment. They had said all what needed to be said earlier, so this time they parted with a long embrace and a loving kiss. Estelle stood alone at the gates as Josephine was taken away. She stayed still as a statue, barely even blinking, until Josephine was out of sight. The servants around saw her turn and run in the opposite direction, but they had no idea where she was going.

As it grew later and later, muttered concerns and whispered suggestions permeated the air of the Cathedral. Estelle seemed to have vanished. She didn’t appear to dine, or to wander around the library as she often did. Not even Leliana and Cassandra knew where she had gone, and they were the most concerned of all. It was so unlike her to just up and leave. Though they knew why she had done so, they were worried she’d somehow gotten herself hurt or in trouble. They both took it in turns to knock on her empty door, and even lingered around their own chambers longer than normal to see if she would appear. The three of them would often meet up in the living area shared by Leliana and Estelle, and that was where the pair were now.

“I’m worried,” admitted Cassandra.  
Leliana nodded, “Me too.”  
“I know Josephine leaving always hits her hard, but she normally just gets on with it.”  
“I know how she feels,” Leliana sighed, “You’d think the more you said goodbye, the more used to it you’d get, the easier it would be, but it’s quite the opposite.”  
“We should find her. She always finds us when we need her. Surely we should be able to do the same?”  
Leliana nodded, “You’d think. But even though we’ve worked together and been friends a long time, I still can’t quite work out what makes her tick.”  
“I don’t like to bring it up…” began Cassandra hesitantly, “But what did _you_ do? When your Warden left.”  
Leliana looked at her for a moment, and then saw sense in her question, “I went as far away as possible, as far as my job permitted anyway. So I wouldn’t burden anyone…” Something seemed to click in her mind.

Leliana shot up, sending her glass clattering to the floor as she did, and pulled on her boots and cloak. Sensing a breakthrough, Cassandra followed suit. The pair of them hurried through empty corridors and darkened rooms, startling the odd servant that was still up. They practically ran across the whole courtyard and through the entire Cathedral, only the moon and sparse torches lighting their way. Eventually Leliana came to a stop, and looked up. Cassandra, still slightly confused, followed her gaze. They were at the foot of the main bell tower. It was a huge, slim building, and usually empty aside from when maintenance was required.

“She’s in there?!” Cassandra clarified.  
“I would bet on it. It’s the furthest part of the Cathedral you can get to before heading out into the city.”

The pair pushed open a small maintenance door at the side, and stared up at the dizzying heights of platforms and wooden ladders that led all the way up to the top. Cassandra could tell something was bothering Leliana.

“You alright?”  
Leliana shifted uncomfortably, “I’m...not a fan of small spaces.”  
Cassandra understood, “And I can’t stand heights,” she already felt her stomach lurching, “But Ellie might be up there.”  
The bard sighed, “Which means we have little choice. Stay behind me?” her voice was almost pleading.  
“I’m all too happy to let you lead.”

They were equally glad they weren’t alone as they scrambled through the half-darkness, going up and up on ladder after ladder, and gingerly edging along narrow platforms. The dust made them cough, and the cobwebs made their skin crawl. They were heartened however, when they saw the odd clean patch. It meant somebody had definitely been there recently. The thought spurred them on, and when they got to the last platform, Leliana pushed open a hatch above them, swinging herself up onto a stone floor, followed by Cassandra.

The great bells were hanging silently above their heads, and they could see for miles and miles around, though Cassandra tried not to look too hard. They glanced around, and their eyes finally settled on their target. There was a lone figure staring out in the direction of Antiva, huddled and hugging her knees, the moon lighting her up like a halo. She was perfectly still, apart from the hair that blew around her face owing to the breeze in the tower. She didn’t seem to have noticed their appearance, and they cautiously walked forwards.

Eventually, Estelle turned to them, the silvery gleam reflecting off her eyes and giving her a kind of otherworldly appearance. They were most struck however by the wan, tired face that they saw, and they both instantly thought of the same word, ‘young’. They often forgot that she wasn’t even near thirty yet, whereas both of them were pushing forty. She was always so bright and full of life, but now, with the pale moon illuminating her, she looked more like a ghost.

“Cassandra? Leliana?” her voice was quiet, and sounded a lot older than normal, “What are you doing here?” she knew both of their fears, and was quite astounded to see them standing in front of her.  
“You actually need to ask?” Cassandra walked towards her, and Estelle looked up. “We came to find you.”  
“Everyone’s concerned about you,” added Leliana.  
“Why?”

The older woman were astounded by just how blank her face was. Did she really not know? Is it possible she had no idea the impact she had on people, just by meeting them? Or maybe she did, but she was so numb just then she couldn’t think. Cassandra crouched down and sat one side of her, and Leliana sat the other.

“I don’t know,” began Cassandra, “Maybe because we haven’t seen you all evening, you haven’t eaten, and nobody knew where you were, what you were doing, or if you’d gotten yourself hurt?” Her tone was not dissimilar to that of a scolding parent.  
Estelle shook it off with a frown, and returned to staring out across the sky, “I’m fine.”  
“Estelle, you’ve been here for hours. You’re _freezing_.” Leliana quickly took her own cloak off and wrapped it around the girl’s shoulders, leaving her arm around her.  
“I appreciate your concern, but I’m sure you have more important things to be doing with your time.”

Estelle’s voice was cold and it stuck the others to their core. She’d never spoken to them like that before. They couldn’t work out where it was coming from, but realised it must be her way of protecting herself, she was shutting down and it frightened them. They’d always thought she was immune to the stress and pressure of her life. She’d successfully led the Inquisition, spread her influence as far as earning Antiva, Nevarra and even the Qunari’s respect, and she’d already used her wiles to outwit a cult and protected Cassandra from an assassin. But no, she was apparently just very good at hiding it. Now she was tired of hiding and she couldn’t keep a lid on it any more. It had all finally caught up with her, the second she had lost sight of Josephine and didn’t know when she’d see her again.

“Not right now we don’t,” Cassandra sighed. She looked at Leliana for support.  
“It’s ok, to  not be fine all the time,” reassured Leliana, “You’re the one that taught _us_ that.”  
  
Estelle turned to her, seemingly starting to register what they were saying. Tentatively, Cassandra rested her hand on the girl’s own, and though she was greeted by glance at the hands, and then her face, the gesture wasn’t all out rejected.

“You’ve seen both of us at our lowest points,” reminded Cassandra, “And you got us through them.”  
“You saw first hand what keeping it all locked away does to you,” a slight shiver went down Leliana’s spine, “And that’s something I never want to see you go through.”  
“You’re quite the expert at helping other people,” the Nevarran smiled, “So it’s only fair if you let us do the same for you. There’s a lot going on in all of our lives. Changes, fears, doubts. If we don’t stand by each other, we’ll all drown in it.”  
“Cassandra and I were searching for you for a long time, we just didn’t realise it until you fell out of the Fade. We’re not about to lose you, least of all to yourself.”   
Cassandra nodded, “Of course not. We’ve grown quite fond of you.”

Both women had to stop themselves sighing with relief as the faintest hint of a smile traced itself across Estelle’s lips. Slowly, she relaxed, and threaded her fingers through Cassandra’s, holding on to them, and Cassandra squeezed them back. She suddenly found herself being hugged from either side, and now the numbness was wearing off and the cold kicking in, she was glad to have them. They were kind enough to pretend not to notice when silent tears finally started falling from her eyes, and the three of them stayed up there, staring at the moon, until she was all cried out, and fell asleep on Cassandra’s shoulder.


End file.
